Everyone Needs Their Memories
by ana anonymous
Summary: When the Cullens left, Bella was changed in a way she wouldn't have preferred. years later, is she coping the way a normal person would? or does she need the help of some old friends to truly be the old Bella everyone knew and loved? better than it sounds
1. Everyone needs Their Memories

**ok, so... first fan fiction ever. so take this with a grain of salt, ok? and this is going to be a longish story... if you guys like the first chapter and think it's good...**

**i guess i need to put a disclaimer? : i own nothing. at all. which makes me really sad.**

_Everybody Needs Their Memories._

The alarm clock sitting next to my unused bed rang shrilly. It wasn't as if it would wake me up, the undead never sleep; rather, it was a reminder that school would be starting soon and I should get ready. I walked the few small paces to my closet and looked for suitable clothing, Forks was rainy and cold, and even if I couldn't feel the chill, I still needed to look as though I did.

Forks. I hadn't been here in years. Decades, actually. After being changed, I watched over Charlie from afar, not getting too close in case the bloodlust made me do something stupid. His health deteriorated, as did his happiness and peace of mind when he lost me. When he died, a mere five years after my disappearance and ultimate proclamation of death, I cursed the heavens for not giving me tears to cry. Renee was harder to keep tabs on, although I tried. She and Phil had left Jacksonville, and apparently settled not far from Atlanta in some little suburb. Renee had died, but my memories of her had become vague, so although I was sad I could not be devastated. Phil was still alive though, somewhere. The pack was always the same. They didn't like me, but they tolerated me. I was given absolution since I wasn't changed by choice. If they only knew that there was a time I would have done anything to become a creature of the night. Jacob just wasn't right anymore after Billy's funeral. I was in attendance, not that anyone could see me from where I watched. I know the wolves smelled my so-called disgusting scent, but they made no gesture of recognizing me. Sam and Emily had had children, and I know they didn't want the werewolf gene to be activated in them, so I had kept my distance for 50 or so years. But now it was time to come back, to a place with so many memories, good, bad, and sometimes so horrible I had to repress them.

The snooze button gave way and the alarm went off again, pulling me out of my reverie and back to the present. I quickly pulled out some jeans and a long sleeve shirt and went to go look in the mirror. My change had definitely been for the better, as far as looks were concerned. I still looked the same, though paler and with gold eyes, but I looked more otherworldly, more sophisticated and less awkward. I was no longer a clumsy child, now more of a graceful woman. If the Cullen's could see me now. If _he_ could see me now. I was not bitter anymore, I just preffered not to think of them.

After making my attempt at brushing out my hair, which was still as unruly as it was in the days before my change, I left my little apartment and started the walk towards Forks High, running where I could. Jacob, in an effort to salvage our friendship, had bought Charlie's old house after he died, and told me I was welcome to live there, since he himself still lived on La Push. The boy had only recently begun to age, and was now somewhere in his mid 20's, though I forgot the exact number. I just couldn't move into that house yet, memories were memories, and they did sometimes still burn.

The high school came into view. Spring break had just ended, and a whole bunch of kids looked like they had spent too much time baking; the burns on some of my classmates looked painful even to me, a girl who doesn't ever burn. I walked to the overhang connected to the cafeteria and pulled out a battered copy of _Anna Karenina. _I had gained a respect for authors other than just Jane Austen. I spent my lonely nights poring over classic literature. My English teacher thought that I was getting help outside of school, trying to explain to himself my straight A's. I couldn't exactly tell him that I had just been through grade 11 English practically more times than I have fingers, so I did nothing to change his mid.

Mr. Dotson came in looking flustered, as always. I dimly wondered if he had put two shots of whiskey in his coffee this morning instead of the normal one. So lost was I in my thoughts of a teachers addictions that I didn't notice the other presence in the classroom until I smelled the draft from the closing door. Standing in front of me was a vampire. One that I would recognize anywhere.


	2. It Always Comes as a Surprise

**Disclaimer: I still own nothing.**

**and i find it funny and really really cool that people actually like this, since i have no self esteem and seem to think everything i write sucks.**

**well... away we go:**

Heidi stared at me for a moment, before replacing the shock on her face with a look of cool indifference. The purple of her contact covered eyes shone brightly with curiosity, but she went and handed her slip to Mr. Dotson before sitting down on the opposite side of the room from me. English continued with glances at the other from both of us; all I wanted to know was why she was here, and why she seemed surprised to find me.

When the bell rang, Justin, also known as Mike 2.0 ran up to me "Bella, do you need a date to the prom? I mean, would you uh, would you go with me?"

"Sorry, Justin, but I'm going to be out of town visiting some family then. Maybe next time."

He hung his head low and mumbled something along the lines of hoping I had a good break, then gave me a faltering smile which turned to one of surprise when he looked over my shoulder. I already knew who was behind me, but the sound of her voice still surprised me.

"Fancy meeting you here, Swan."

Heidi. "I would say the same for you, but I don't find this a pleasant surprise. Excuse us Justin, I'll catch up with you at lunch, ok?" he said his goodbyes, but we were already walking away from him, my hand gripping her arm in what might seem like a friendly touch. "Spill, Heidi. What are you doing here? And before we continue this conversation, I have to ask you to hunt only outside of the city limits, if you stay for long. Which I'm hoping you don't."

"Jesus, way to welcome a guest. I hunted outside of Seattle before I came here so you don't need to worry about me for a little while. I came to check up on you. Aro sends his regards, and hopes you have thought about his offer." She smiled and played with a strand of hair while looking idly at the humans wandering from classes.

"Well, since I've had about 30 years to consider his offer, I must say I am still pretty damn sure I don't want anything to do with your little family. Besides, I'm still not sure why he even asked, I don't have any talents. " She always knew how to bring up my annoyance. I just wanted her to get to the point of this visit so she could leave and I could return to my peaceful existence. "Wait, how long exactly are you planning on staying?"

"Calm down, girl. Seriously, why you get so pissy when you're around me I will never understand. And I can't tell you why they want you, since I don't know myself. But actually, I do have some news for you, and then I will be on my merry little way and you can resume your boring little life." I waited for her to continue and then sighed when I found that she was going to stretch this out as far as she could. She licked her lips and looked towards a group of senior boys. 'God, they smell delicious. How do you put up with this? Day after day, resisting your temptations. You know some dead author once said that the only way to rid yourself of temptations is to yield to them."

My god she was being dense. I was late for chemistry, and I only wanted to get this over with. "Heidi, come on, what the hell is this going to take? Can you please just give me the news?"

"You know you really are no fun at all," she replied, looking at me with a smirk of disdain "but I hate this place, so I guess the sooner we get this over with, the sooner I can leave." Thank the lord this was almost over. "We had a visitor not long ago. Or should I say a few visitors?"

The hair on my arms stood up, and I couldn't get rid of the bad taste, not venomous, at the back of my throat. "What did he want?"

"Well, your dear forlorn sweetheart seems to be under the impression that you must have died of old age by now. Funny that he hasn't figured out that you are one of us. Anyways, he begged us to get rid of him in any way possible, but you know Aro and his thought process. 'What a waste this would be'. So, after detaining him and calling for Carlisle, Edward was taken from Volterra with strict orders to clear his head of all this rubbish of wanting to die. Marcus was quite curious after he left, since you did the same thing only a few decades ago. He wanted me to come see you and ask why you haven't gone looking for Edward since it is obvious you can't be happy without him."

All of this was more than just confusing. "Why the hell would he do something like that? he doesn't need me in his life, and just because I can't be happy without him doesn't mean he can be happy with me. Tell Marcus that there is nothing to be curious about. All he sees is a lover cast away from the person she needs because he didn't need her. Why he had a momentary lapse of judgment is beyond me, but remember, he is the one who fell for a human in the first place, so he can't be all there anyways." It didn't hurt to think about that night so long ago anymore, but talking about it was another matter. The tingles around the edges of my closed up hole told me as much. "Look, Heidi, as much as I appreciate you coming here and drudging up old memories, there is this little thing called moving on I need to do. And, other than when people like you come and hinder me, I am doing pretty well with that. So is that all?"

Heidi's look of amusement grew even more pronounced when she uttered her next words. "Well, now that you mention it, there is one more thing. Aro may have mentioned to Carlisle of your existence. And he may be coming to find you. But I may have to facts wrong." Her smile said otherwise.

My stomach dropped and I felt like I might be sick, something impossible for a vampire. Coming? Here? A Cullen? Should I leave, or stay? Would he follow if I left? Was it even a bad thing that he was coming? I glanced up at Heidi, who was still watching with that look of amusement on her face. Straightening up, I sighed and told her what was in my case goodbye "thank you for the warning, Heidi. Send Aro and Marcus my regards and have a safe trip back home. Perhaps I will come visit soon. But not too soon." My mind was elsewhere, and my frantic mumbling was not lost on her. She laughed gaily, saluted me like a soldier being sent away, and marched towards the parking lot.

I really needed to clear my head and think about all of this.


	3. Always Time, On My Mind

**This is the last one for today, I have to start studying for my art history test (eep!) enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: the day I own something, I promise I'll share it all with you.**

_Renee was crying, harder than I have ever seen anyone cry. She clung to Phil with all the strength left in her while he rubbed circles on her back. I knew these tears were not just for Charlie, but also for me. My gravestone, marking a bodiless casket, was only a couple of yards away from the podium where Billy was talking._

"_He was the best sort of friend anyone could have. The most loyal husband, the most caring father…" I didn't want to hear any more. I walked far enough away and sat down, trying to cry. I could feel the tears on the corners of my eyes, but they refused to fall._

_I wondered if my funeral was like this. I didn't even think about coming since I was still too young and afraid I would attack the mourning. But it had been a few years, and I felt strong enough to come to pay my last respects to Charlie. My poor, poor Charlie. I had only really gotten to know him in the span of almost two years. And then, once I was gone, he reverted into a zombie-like state. He went back to eating those disgusting greasy precooked foods, since there was no one left to cook for him. It was this that caused his blood pressure to skyrocket, and when he had the heart attack, it was no surprise to the doctors who worked on him. Unfortunately, the work done was not enough. The funeral was a mere 5 days after the heart attack. He just couldn't hold on. Showing up and looking at the funeral from afar, I noticed a lot of people. The Newton's were there, Mike looking greasier than ever. He must have graduated from college by now. The entire police force, some in uniform, others in suits. Renee was beautiful for a person in mourning. Phil looked distraught, as if the only reason he came was for Renee. The whole pack, the Clearwater's, the Uley's. Jacob glanced back to where I was hiding, but didn't give me any indication he saw me, or wanted to. When the rain started, it felt right. Like the angels knew that since I couldn't cry, the sky would for me. Then again, this was Forks; it rained all the time, so this might not mean anything._

_They started piling the dirt on top of his coffin then, and I walked away, thinking about how in a normal existence, I would not have to watch my father being buried. I would not have a marker right next to his. We would both be alive. I would probably be in college and he might have retired by now. I wish it had turned out differently._

_I smelled him before I heard him. "Bella." Jacob said as he walked towards me. Jacob, my sun. The kid who helped pick up the broken fragments and piece me back together. "Sam doesn't think you should have come."_

"_Well, tell Sam he can just rot in hell. How can he have the nerve to-" I was immediately pissed off, but Jacob cut me off before I could continue bashing on his Alpha._

"_Bells, calm down." His hands were shaking, but he tried to stop it. "Sam obviously didn't stop you from coming, but he was just worried. You know, a lot of people. Potential victims. Prey. Look, I agree with you, this is your father we're talking about Charlie. You had to be here, no way around it." Jacob ran a hand through his hair, and I knew he was thinking about the eventual death of Billy. Even after these few years, I could still read his expressions. "But Billy wanted me to give you this. I think he's crazy, but he is right. This does belong to you." He handed me a thick envelope._

"_What is this?" I asked, holding it from me as if it might explode._

"_It's what Charlie left for Billy, things that were originally left for you. After you disappeared and we held your funeral, he revised his will. Billy only thinks it's right to give this to you, since you are technically still around, even if you aren't alive."_

_I felt the tears come to my eyes again, and I became even more upset that I couldn't actually spill them. "Thank you Jacob. And please, please tell Billy that I thank him too. This means so much to me." Despite the smell, I really wanted to hug the mutt. I resisted though, knowing that his instincts might kick in and one of us could get hurt._

"_So," Jacob said, the awkward cloud looming over our heads engulfing us. I guess I'll talk to you later, or maybe not. Maybe we'll see each other soon. Then again…" I knew what he was trying to say, and I replied with one word._

"_Hopefully."_

That was 67 years ago. Both of us were still young, though he was now growing. We had spoken over the phone, but I haven't actually seen him since. I paced by the border, wondering when of If her would actually show up. If another vampire was coming to town, I had to warn him and the pack.


	4. Best Friends Means I Pull the Trigger

**Disclaimer: I own a pair of tube socks and a sock monkey named spectacular sam. However, I own nothing else.**

_Beyond my screams of pain I could hear people conversing. My hearing kept going in and out of focus, sometimes it sounded like they were right next to me, other times it sounded as if they were across the room. I felt feverish, cold and hot at the same time. And then I heard him. _

"_Bella. Bells, can you hear me? Try and nod your head, ok?" I did my best, and he noticed it. "I can't stay any longer. I have to leave, because when you wake up there's a pretty good chance you're going to try and eat me." I felt pressure on my forehead, then my lips. "Bells, I will always love you, even if you smell and we can't be friends. I'll watch Charlie for you, ok? And know that I'm not leaving you here to drive you crazy, but this was the only place we knew to take you. Sam says that if you know what's good for you, you will actually follow the Cu- you will actually follow their path and not eat people. Animals are ok, I guess. As long as you don't go around killing off wolves." he attempted humour. "I hope everything works out for you, Bella. Maybe once you can control yourself we can see each other again. I'm just sorry it wont be like it used to be. And I'm sorry that I couldn't stop this from happening." He squeezed my hand and I heard him getting up. "I'm so sorry, Bella. Goodbye." _

_The fires that had consumed my body began to die down. I started gasping for breath, feeling as though I hadn't breathed in the longest time. My vision was blurry. Either too focused or not enough. I fell off of whatever I had been laying on and crawled around looking for something to lean on. I found a wall of cool glass. Already it was all clicking. I closed my eyes and tried to think happy thoughts. When I opened them however, any happy thoughts I had flew out of my mind. I was looking at a place I thought I would never be welcome in again. I didn't know which would have been worse, seeing It as it had been the night of my ill-fated birthday party, or seeing it completely empty. I got the former. There were no white sheets over the furniture. It was as if they still lived here, except for the unkempt yard I saw from the window, and the broken front door. I assumed that was the work of Jacob or one of his werewolf cronies. I wondered what the Cullens would think of me. _

A snapping twig broke my thoughts and brought me back to the present.

Jacob ambled up to me with a slightly confused look in his eyes. Trailing behind him were Seth and Embry. Seth still hadn't started aging, but Embry had. He was the "oldest" of the three, with a child on the way. Both of them seemed to like me, something I was grateful for. But that didn't mean we were friends. Jacob, on the other hand was as friendly to me as two mortal enemies can be towards one another. After the usual greetings ("leech" and "mutt" among the nicknames), we stood awkwardly until Jacob broke the silence.

"So, Bells, not that I don't love getting a call from you, but what is this all about?" he asked, as if he had somewhere to be.

"Well, I thought it would be a good idea to warn all of you that a vampire might be coming in to town. Actually, there was one here today, but she left. I'm not sure if it will be just him, but Carlisle Cullen might come looking for me. I just thought it would be fair to tell you so you don't freak out." I spoke fast for a normal person, trying to get it out quickly and hoping Jacob wouldn't blow up like I thought he might.

"A Cullen! Bella fucking Swan! What the hell is a Cullen doing back in Forks? Why would you let them come back, after what Ed- what _he_ did to you!?" Jacob was shaking so hard, Seth was gripping him and trying to keep him from making the wrong move.

"Jake, calm down. I'm sure I want this just as much as you do, but can we try to find a way to work this out where you and your friends don't kill someone who can give me answers?" I knew he would ask me annoying and painful questions, but I was certain Carlisle would also give me answers. "I need to know, Jacob. I need to know about all of what's been going on with hi-with them. "

"Why, Bella? So that you can forgive them and run off to be with _Edward_? A guy who never gave a shit about you? You must be that desperate!" Jacob was only saying these things out of pain, not with an intention to hurt me. However, he was shaking so hard that Embry came up too to help Seth restrain him. And he had hit a nerve with me.

"Jacob Black, calm down this instant! Do you think I called them up and invited them here? Do you think I asked them to come for tea or told them, hey, I miss you guys, why don't you come down and we'll harass a bunch of werewolves? What kind of a person do you think I am? I know what they did to me and I don't want them here, but I can't stop it! And before you say a word," Jacob had just opened his mouth and tried to interject, but I spoke right over him "you cannot stop them either! Not because you don't have the strength to, but because they were my family! Just because they left me and told me they didn't want me anymore doesn't mean that for that short time, they weren't my family!" apparently over 70 years of knowing someone doesn't mean that you always know the right thing to say to them. Faster than I could even blink, were-Jacob took the place of human Jacob. He growled at me, and pounced.

But something stopped him.

**Sorry, I was in the mood to do a cliffy. So here's the deal. If you review, I'll send you a sneak peek of the next chapter (but more importantly: do you even care? :P). But I wont actually post the next chapter until I get 5 more reviews, or until I get too antsy to wait any longer. just tell me how you think i'm doing, or if i should keep going.**

**And if you haven't yet, I recommend you go rent atonement. That movie has got to be the best film I have seen in a very long time. And will probably be the number one movie on my list until 12.12 teehee.**


	5. Those You've Known

**Disclaimer: I wish I owned a jet plane so I could fly to Hertfordshire, England right now. But I don't, and I don't own this either.**

A white blur with blonde hair shot out and hit Jacob; it sounded like a huge boulder hitting wet sand. Jacob was still the softer of the two, and though I had braced my ears for the impacting sound of two huge stones, I was worried when the wet gravel sound greeted me. I ran over to where the two creatures were fighting, trying to see if Jacob was ok, or if he had wounded what I assumed was Carlisle.

Jake was limping, and faster than ever before, I ran over to him and leaned protectively over him. I didn't want him hurt, but I also didn't want Carlisle to be hurt either. I yelled at Seth and Embry, asking them to calm Jacob down, while I looked over at Carlisle, who was crouched over. But no, this vampire was too tall to be Carlisle. As I approached him I noticed he was too lanky to be Carlisle as well.

"Think you could help me?" came a voice I hadn't thought I would ever hear again. "I mean, I know that after I ruined everyone's lives with that stunt I pulled at your party you would probably rather leave me here looking for my arm myself, but," Jasper said, turning around and showing a torso missing one its appendages, "I would still really appreciate help in finding the damn thing."

I glanced one more time at Jacob and his friends. Seth was still a Werewolf, but Jacob and Embry had changed back. Jake was holding his arm and looked like he was in considerable pain. "Did Carlisle come?" I asked jasper, "Maybe he could take a look at Jacobs arm?" But before I even got my answer, a very picky werewolf said he would be just fine and walked off with the other two towards the reservation.

"Well, how about we find my arm and then we can go find a place to talk. Because you know we really need to." Came his reply. He was touching the area where his arm would attach itself, and wincing a little as he spoke. "So, it should be long, white, hard, and cold. Five little things jutting out one end of it. Alice will kill me if I come home missing an arm" I felt a stab as I remembered my best friend.

We didn't say anything as we searched. Finally he found it sticking out of a pile of wet leaves, the fingers still moving. After 70 years of this life, I had still not seen that, so it made me feel a little sick. "Where would you like to talk?" I asked, trying not watch as he reattached his limb.

"How about our old house. That is supposed to be where I stay while I'm here. However long that may be."

"Uh." I wasn't so sure his place was a great idea. Especially not after I had spent 5 years tearing it apart. "Sure?"

_I looked around for something to break. I ran up the stairs, marveling at how I didn't trip even once. Third story, room on the southern side. Gold carpeting, leather, music. I picked up the radio, wanting to smash it. But I found that I couldn't. Not this. Not this room. Not his things. I sat there for a while. Thinking about why I couldn't destroy something of his when he had destroyed me. I got up and slowly walked out of his room. Closing the door for what I hoped was the last time. Making my way down stairs to the living room, I destroyed everything. Windows, furniture, the television set, Emmett's games. The only thing I left standing was the piano._

We ran in the direction of the old Cullen house. I knew when he saw what had happened, because the waves of confusion and then remorse hit me clearly. I was afraid to look at him, but too curious not to. He was looking down at me with a knowing face, one devoid of blame.

"Well, I guess coming here after you were changed would be pretty logical. After all, we were the only vampires you knew." He kept walking and went inside. Time had treated the ruin pretty well. Besides the broken windows, the walls had stood up to the sands of time, as had the roof. "Funny how you couldn't ruin the piano,." he called from inside the house. I walked in, ashamed at how my change had caused me to behave during the first few years of my new existence. "Don't be," he added, feeling my emotions of guilt. "if anything, I should be ashamed. Look at how my actions ruined your life."

"Jasper, I never blamed you. Ever. Not even when it happened. I told Alice to tell you it was ok. And you haven't ruined my life."

"How can you say that? if I never tried to attack you that night, Edward might have never left. You two might have been happy together, and you might have grown old and died of natural causes. This way, everything Edward wanted for you has gone wrong. We told him it would, but he never listened to us…" he trailed off and ran his newly reattached hand through his hair.

What I don't understand is why it had to be what Edward wanted for me. No consideration for what I wanted for myself. "Jasper, where's Carlisle? I was told he was supposed to be the one to come and find me." Not that I wasn't happy to see Jasper, but at this rate I needed someone who could give me a logical explanation to the events that took place almost a century ago.

"Well, it turns out that when he thought Edward was out of the house, he let his guard down and started thinking about you. But Edward was off hiding and sulking somewhere, and he heard every little thought about you. I think it goes without saying that he flipped. So Carlisle stayed there trying to talk some sense into the poor guy, and when he noticed that my little talent wasn't having any effect on Edward, he sent me to find you. He also hoped that if I could keep you calm, you wouldn't run away. Who told you anyone was coming at all?"

"Heidi. Apparently the Volturi is curious about Edward and me. Still don't know why. She also told me Edward tried to get them to kill him…" this was something I really wanted an answer to.

"Bella, you have to understand. Edward wasn't exactly a piece of cake once we left Forks. Up until a few years ago, I couldn't even live in the same house with him. Alice and I lived down the street, close enough, but still far enough where I didn't want to rip myself to pieces or break down because of his emotions. Emmett and Rosalie even went away for a little while, just another honeymoon, trying to get away from the mood. Carlisle started taking extra shifts at the hospital he worked at the first time we moved, but I think he realized Edward couldn't be trusted alone so after we moved again he stopped doing that. Alice blamed him, and no matter what we tried to do she wouldn't speak to him for years. Before Alice and I moved out, I caught him looking at a picture of you two. The feelings of regret and love coming from him were almost too much to handle. When he left you, it was for your own good, not because he didn't want you." This was the most I had ever heard Jasper speak. I almost didn't realize he was waiting for a reply until he cleared his throat and brought me back to my senses.

**Ok so I'm ending it here because I'm going out celebrating the A I got on my test! YAY!**

**Ok so, 5 reviews new chapter. Reviewers get a sneak peek.**

**Love you all! Peace!**


	6. Time turned Fragile

**Disclaimer: since Adam just jetted off to Israel, I want that private jet I don't own to fly me there. But since I don't own one, I will have to write a fan fiction using characters I also don't own.**

"Bella?" Jasper sounded worried.

"Yes jasper?" I said, trying to figure out how I should I reply to his statements. I could feel the hole eating at me from the inside out. I needed an out from this situation.

"What are you feeling? I can't feel anything from you. Not confusion, or anger or sadness. Nothing." He was definitely getting antsy.

"I, I don't know." I guess I was feeling numb. "Jasper, I appreciate all of this. I really do. But what am I supposed to feel? How do I know you aren't lying? How am I supposed to know anything you've said is true? There is no way for me to know. And I would really appreciate you not saying anything to Edward about this conversation. I have no doubts he will hear you thinking about it. But, I don't know how I feel about any of this, and I need to think. I need to go do something." I was clutching at loose threads, hoping to pull at something that would make him leave so I could forget about all of this and let the now reopened wound in my heart close again.

"I'm sure you don't want me around Bella, but I might stay in town for a few days. Not for long, but just in case you need someone to talk to. Maybe if you figure all of what is going through your head out, you will come see me." I made movements towards the entrance. "Bella!" he called after me. "Carlisle had one question for you. There are more, but those are questions that should be left to him. I don't want to intrude so much. I know we were never exactly close, so I would understand you not wanting to give me the answers to those. But, Carlisle asked me to tell you that if you need any… eh… financial help, he would be glad to help you out. He does still consider you his daughter, you know. And Alice still considers you her sister. She was so upset when she found out she wouldn't be coming with me. She really wanted to see how everything was going with you."

Sure. The scorned daughter cast away. "Tell Carlisle thank you for his offer, but for the time being, I'm all set money wise." I smiled to myself, remembering the things Charlie had left, inadvertently, to me. I had, through an anonymous real estate company, sold Charlie's house for a decent amount of money (to someone who never even stepped foot in the place, until Jacob bought it from him for next to nothing). And Billy had cashed in some old stocks of his, so all in all I had enough to live, maybe not in exceeding comfort, but all that money spent 70 years getting dusty in a bank, so it had increased into enough. I was just worrying about when I would have to get a job, and if I would be able to keep my secret when I did. "And wait, couldn't Alice see what was going on with me anyways? I was really surprised that she didn't see my change."

I felt some waves of confusion come off of him before he reined them in. "Edward asked her not to look for you. Actually, he demanded that she not. One of the reasons she broke off ties with him. But for the past few weeks since we found out, she has been trying to see you, but nothing. She can't see your future."

"Huh." Was all I could manage.

"I'll let you go. Just please come to me if you have any questions. And please think about what I've said to you. I wouldn't lie to you, Bella. Why should I? I wouldn't come back here after all the pain we caused you just to rub it in your face." His face showed me that he wanted to say more, but he kept whatever it was to himself.

"What will you do while you're here?" I asked. I hoped he didn't want me to entertain him, because I was moments away from fleeing.

"Well, I should clean this place up. I know Carlisle and Esme will eventually want to move back here. I don't think they would appreciate seeing this sight." He chuckled. "It looks as if Emmett and I got into the wrestling match of the century."

I laughed along with him, but it was a strange sound coming out of my mouth. Laughing was almost foreign to me nowadays. I didn't speak to many people anymore, and therefore I didn't often have a need to voice anything. "I guess you should be getting started then. It might take you longer to clean than you think. I did a pretty thorough job." I waved goodbye, not knowing how else to give him a farewell.

**Ok, ok, I know, short chapter. But, because I got a shxtload of hits, and only two days after i even started writing, I am in one of my generous moods, and will be posting another chapter before the day is out.**

**But now: i think i may try and get some sleep. i never sleep well when adam is out of the country, and my insomnia is driving me crazayyyy. review please! and tell me, i have a little outline for the story in my head, but what would you like to see? if it doesn't drastically change my plot, i'll most probably add it (with credits given of course).**

**Peace!**


	7. Biting Your Brother

**Disclaimer: I now own a video chat program. And a slight hangover. But not this ******

**Bee tee dubs: this is most likely the only p.o.v. chapter that isn't Bella's. I'm pretty sure there aren't any more. Pretty sure, anyways.**

_Alice_

I sat across the room, looking at my brother. Edward was trying to get out of Emmett's grip and towards the door, while Carlisle tried to explain that this wasn't a good idea. Rosalie was watching all of this with a bemused expression, as she had been all week. She seemed to find this even more interesting than television or her appearance.

"Edward, listen to me! We don't know what has happened to her in her life, or how she was changed! We know nothing! For all we know, she started running away when Jasper found her. Listen, son, you need to calm down. If you run to her in this sort of state she will most probably be shocked and deeply confused. Recall what you said to her the last time you ever saw her." That statement earned Carlisle a growl from the frantic boy.

"Edward Anthony Masen Cullen! Calm down this instant!" Esme's normally soft voice rang sharply through the house. After we left, our mother figure sunk into a state close to depression, but not as useless. She still did chores, still kept the house clean, and still mothered us. But she never raised her voice anymore, not that there was much need. Before, the only time she had the need to yell was when Emmett and Jasper got into one of their fights in the house or trampled through her garden. Jasper and I had been out of the house for much of this time, and Emmett seemed to lose the desire to cause a ruckus. So, needless to say, even Carlisle was a little surprised when he heard his wife scream. It was enough of a surprise that Edward got out of Emmett's momentarily slackened grip. But for once he was not quick enough. I slammed into him, giving Emmett enough time to grab him again.

"Seriously, Edward. Did you really think you could get away with that? Mind reader, remember?" I asked him, rolling my eyes. It wasn't as if I didn't still love my brother, but he had screwed up not just his relationship with Bella, but everyone else's relationship with her too.

"Don't you think I know that now?" Edward snarled, answering my thoughts. "Emmett, if you don't let go of me this instant I swear to god I will rip your-"

"Edward! Language! Now you listen to me, young man. I know that I am not your real mother, but I have always treated you like a son. And I am hoping that you will listen to us this time, unlike the last time something this drastic happened. And calm down! Not only for our sakes or your sake, but for Bella's sake!" Esme was walking on thin ice. Luckily she knew how to skate. "How do you think she would feel if she saw you right now? She has spent how many years believing that you didn't want her?" I was glad she chose this route. Some of the other things she wanted to say would have led to a more dangerous route considering Edward's volatile temper right now. And Jasper would be calling in 3…2…1…

"I miss you." Was the first thing I said when I flipped open the phone and answered his call.

"Is that Jasper? Let me speak to him, please." Carlisle said, looking at wits end. Even Edward had stopped struggling to try and hear the conversation. I handed him the phone. "How is she?" a pause. "So she didn't run? Does she need anything?" another pause. I didn't even try to listen in, knowing I would be asking these same questions to Jasper in a few minutes. "How is she feeling? Really? Are you sure?" Carlisle looked perplexed. "I may look into this. Has she said anything about-"

"Just tell the little rebel to bring Bella back here damnit!" Emmett yelled. He was getting tired of having to hold Edward back, and I was sure he was missing his bed, and Rose. Rosalie just rolled her eyes and started playing with her always perfect fingernails.

Emmett, be quiet." Carlisle was calm, but firm. "Jasper, how long do you think you'll be there?" after getting an answer he wasn't sure he liked, he said his goodbyes and handed the phone to me.

"How is she?" I asked quickly. I needed this answer first before I could ask him anything else. Remembering quickly, I shot a look at Edward and ran outside. In case he said something to me he hadn't mentioned to Carlisle, I didn't want Edward picking my brain apart and trying to dissect it.

"Well, I really miss you too, sweetheart. And thank you for asking. I have been having just a lovely time, what with being attacked by werewolves and stumped by Bella Swan." His tone was sarcastic, but tinted with humour.

"Wait! Werewolves? You're all right though, right? And don't act like that, you know I miss you. I'm still pissed that I'm not with you, but I guess it was a good idea I stayed here, Edwards plans of escape are becoming more drastic. He actually almost bit Emmett, and in my head it was hilarious. Sorry, I'm ranting. You're ok, right?" I was worried about my husband but also concerned with other matters.

"I'm fine."

"Ok good, so now that we have that out of the way, how is Bella?" my best friend. I missed torturing her by playing Bella Barbie, and I missed how she made Edward feel. Stupid ass.

"Well, actually Alice, I don't really know. I saw her," he said, before I asked if he had found her or not "and we spoke. But I couldn't feel her after a certain point. It was like when I focused my energy towards her figure, I felt nothing, no emotions radiating off of her. It was surreal, I'm not used to it."

"Do you think she would come here?" I crossed my fingers and hoped she would. I wanted to apologize myself for the family's actions.

"Alice, I really don't think so. If she does, it's going to be through a lot of persuasion."

"Oh." That wasn't a good sign. "Has she said anything about Edward?"

"Not really. But you want to know the weird thing? She basically tore down the house. Turns out that's where she went after she was turned. Everything is destroyed, all except for the piano in the front room and his room upstairs. It was as if she couldn't do anything in his room. I know she went in there, because the door handle on the outside had her handprints in it." He sighed. "Anyways, it's been a lot to clean up."

"Do you think I could-" I started to ask if I could come down, but Jasper cut me off.

"Considering the way she greeted me, I'm not sure if it's wise. She doesn't trust us." He sounded saddened by that fact.

"So how long do you think you'll be there?" if I couldn't see Bella, I at least wanted Jasper back with me.

Jasper started to answer, but a loud crash from the direction of the house distracted me. I immediately had a vision of Edward running. I needed to call Denali. "Jasper, I need to go, but I'll call you soon ok, I love you" I said quickly and hung up the phone.

**Ok, so 5 reviews next chapter. Reviewers get sneak peeks.**

**And uhm…who is going on the date form hell tonight?! Raises hand. I am an instant away from eating something that will make me sick and therefore unable to go through with this horrible thing.**

**Anyways… Review!**

**Peace!**


	8. Dust

**So i didn't get the 5 reviews I needed to post this chapter… but in less than 3 days I've gotten over 400 hits, which I consider good (is this good? I'm new to fanfiction so bear with me!) so in a fit of happiness I posted this chapter up. But the five review rule is still in play :P**

**Disclaimer: I own a record player and actual Beatles records. So those are playing while I play with characters I don't own.**

I walked slowly away from the white house. When I couldn't see it anymore, I started running, and I didn't stop until I reached the small two-story home that a young girl and her policeman father once resided in. I hadn't been here since the day of Charlie's funeral.

_My things had not been touched. The smell of him still lingered around the old rocking chair, too subtle for a humans nose but just barely there for a vampire. I looked away from it. I stared at the heap of plastic and wires that once was my new car radio. I walked over to and sat on my old bed. Even after 5 years, it still hadn't been made. I traced the patterns on the old blanket my grandmother made for me._

_I heard voices, and then smelled Renee and Phil, and so I jumped out of the window. I couldn't risk them seeing me._

The first thing I noticed was the smell. A vampire had been here; although the smell was so faded I couldn't tell who it had been. It seemed to have been years ago, anyways, so I brushed any worries from my mind. The house looked exactly the same, only cleaned up, and dusty.

I walked up to my old bedroom and peeked in. the bed was made neatly and the now positively ancient computer was still there. I crawled onto the bed and closed my eyes. I wished I could fall asleep, but no such luck.

Jasper had struck a chord. A rubbed the place where my heart once beat, trying to numb out the throbbing pain I felt. How was I supposed to forgive them? More importantly, him? I felt the tears well up in my eyes. When he left me, he promised me I would never be bothered by any of his family again. I spent years trying to forget about them, finally accepting that this was an impossible feat and I should just give up. And now, all of a sudden, there they were, or at least one of them. I think I was most worried about the rest of them suddenly showing up. Worried and confused. I knew why I had run off to Volterra, but why had he? He said it himself; he didn't want me anymore. And besides, that was almost a century ago, why should it bother him now?

After he left, I had dreams about getting turned and running off to find him, thinking he might want me when I was beautiful, unbreakable, strong like him. After I actually was changed, I knew better. Any futile hope I had was crushed whenever I remembered that night. How could he ever love me? Sadly, when my eating habits and looks changed, my self-confidence didn't.

I didn't like this. Not at all. Jasper Hale was in my town bringing up subjects I attempted to bury years ago. At least one member of his family was sure to follow, and I couldn't decide who I would hate seeing least. Rubbing my temples and squeezing me eyes shut, I thought about the events that took place today. Jasper showed up and attacked- oh! Jacob! I forgot about him in all my thoughts.

"Running downstairs and praying the phone would work, I was happy to find it did and called Jacobs house. I was trying to figure out how to voice my apology when Seth answered the phone. "Yellow."

"Seth. I need to speak to Jacob." He would know it was me, so I didn't bother with formalities.

"Erm, Bells, I think that that may not be the best idea right now. He hasn't fully calmed down. Now, I know you and the blonde leech are innocent, Jacob got all carried away and the dude was trying to protect you, but Jacob doesn't see that right now. He is split between coming to find you and yell his head off or just going to find the other guy and kicking some ass. Some Alpha, huh?" I was actually a little surprised Seth would be talking about the leader of the pack that way. "He has a temper like Paul used to. Eventually though, he'll calm down and remember the guidelines of the treaty."

"So I can't drop by and see what's for dinner then?" I had no idea where this humour came from.

"Very funny, Bella." Seth always found me tolerable, and he was a pretty good kid.

"Would you apologize to Jacob for me? I lost all my tact and said some things I shouldn't have. That's why he got so angry."

"Sure, sure. Oh, and before I forget, how long is the bloodsucker going to be in town for?" he said cheerfully.

"I'm really not sure. Hopefully not for long." I prayed.

"are you sure you don't want us to handle him?"

Sounded slightly intriguing, but I would never do that to any one of them, no matter how far they stuck the knife in my back. "I'm sure. Thanks for the offer though. You're a pal, Seth."

"Pals? With a bloodsucking crypt living leech? Never! But, you're all right too, Bella Swan."

We said our goodbyes and I hung up the phone and looked around. If I didn't dust around here soon, it would become one giant dust bunny and allergic people everywhere would come with torches and burn the place. I found all the old cleaning supplies right where I had always kept them, and started to clean. The one problem with cleaning is, it can be menial, mindless work. And when you have nothing to focus on, you tend to think.

I wanted more answers, but I was afraid I would have to go to Carlisle for those.


	9. Putting Baby in the Corner

**Disclaimer: I own a broken camera and a blanket that doesn't keep me warm at night. But I don't own this.**

As I approached the white house, I could hear Jasper speaking on the phone. I kept upwind of him, wanting to hear his conversation, but not wanting him to smell me.

"What are you talking about?" he sounded exasperated. I walked slowly up the porch and sat near a pane less window. "So what are you guys… are you sure you don't need me to… just make sure he doesn't… Alice, don't get fussy with me, ok? I know you're not stupid, I'm just asking you to make sure. Ok... I love you too. We'll speak soon." He hung up the phone and I took this moment to stand up and walk in to the front room.

Jasper had actually done a pretty good job so far. The wreckage was gone, and it looked as if he had been giving the floors a scrubbing down when he got on the phone. The piano had been dusted off and I walked up to it, while he watched warily.

"So how's the wife?" I asked as I fingered the keys on the piano. I didn't want to look at him.

"She's fine. She asked me to bring you up to the house. I told her it was your choice." He came and sat down on the piano bench.

"Where exactly is your house?" I tried changing the subjects.

He knew what I was doing. "This tiny town called Galena, in Alaska. Carlisle heard that they didn't even have a permanent doctor there, and since the place isn't accessible by roads, it's hard for people to get medical help. So he went up there, bringing us with him. It's actually really nice, but the summers are extremely short. If you like the snow though, it's heaven." He turned from leaning on the piano and actually started to play.

I didn't know how else to say it, but before I even could, "I can feel you again, by the way." Jasper's piano playing could not rival Edward's, but it was good nonetheless. Perhaps a bit darker, not a cheerful tune.

"Really? And what am I feeling, all mighty knower?" I said sarcastically. He was messing with me.

"Well, right now you are feeling anxious to get something over with, and overwhelmed, although I can't tell why. You're also giving me waves of stubborn anger, now, would those be directed at me?" he smirked and then stopped playing. Standing up, he said "I'm happy you came back to talk."

"How do you know I came to talk? Maybe I came to ask you to leave, or maybe I came to finish off destroying the place." I balled my hands up into fists and pretended to punch the piano.

"Well, I'll go with my instincts and say that you want to talk, and not do either of the latter things."

"Fine," I sighed, and sat down on the bench he had left vacant. "I need to see Carlisle."

"Ah, I knew you would come around."

"There is no coming around, jasper. I need some answers to some questions, and that's it."

"If you say so." The little leech sounded a bit smug. But then he remembered something and sat down next to me and gave me a look. "And how do you propose you do this without seeing Edward; I know you wouldn't agree to go if there was a chance you would see him."

"Can you just keep him away from me while I get my answers? It wouldn't be for long." I was proposing something and had hoped it could be accomplished. If it couldn't I didn't know what I would do.

"Bella, I just got off the phone with Alice. Do you know what she told me?" I gave him a look that clearly stated that I was no mind reader, so he continued. "He was running, to come here. But don't worry!" I had gotten up to leave. "Tanya and our friends from Denali intercepted him. He had to go by Denali to get here anyways, so Alice called them up when she had a vision of his plans. He's with them now."

"Now, Bella, Alice is flying to Denali to bring our brother back to Galena. Since we would have to fly back there anyways from the airport in Anchorage, I asked her to get four tickets back. I didn't know if you would be coming, but I hoped. And I'm not sure if she did it or not, but I asked for two sets of tickets on opposite ends on the plane. You could sit with Alice if you like, and you wouldn't have to deal with Edward. When we get to Galena, Emmett can handle Edward. In all honesty, I hope Edward beats on him a little, since the all brawn and no brains vampire had the nerve to call me a rebel earlier." He gave a disgusted look and mumbled something about how they almost won the war too. "Do you think you could do that?"

"There's no other way to do this? Why can't Carlisle come here? Or maybe we could meet up somewhere else?" I was at my wits end trying to figure out another solution. But I knew one would not be found. Carlisle wouldn't want to leave his patients for so long, even a few days. And I wouldn't really even ask him too out of guilt.

"I know you know the answer to that Bella."

Looking up at him, I knew. I closed my eyes and leaned back against the piano.


	10. Exhibitionism is a Sport Few Play Well

Disclaimer: I own a ridiculously torn up pair of blue jeans that I've had since I was 12... and still fit into. But I don't own this.

Jasper had to keep calming me. Apparently he couldn't feel me again, but it didn't stop him from trying to keep me from jumping out of the car. I had my hand on the door handle, and every few minutes had thoughts of just opening it and escaping. 'You are the one who said this was ok. This is not a hostage situation.' I kept telling myself.

Jasper was a fast driver, and told me while we were driving that the car actually belonged to Eleazar, one of the vampires in Tanya's coven. He borrowed it so he could drive from Denali to Forks, reminding me of the inability to drive out of Galena. I drummed my fingers on my thigh, thinking about this entire situation. When we were about an hour outside of Anchorage, he called Alice to find out if she had arrived yet. Pleased with the answer, he sped up and then turned to me.

"Sorry, I just want to see Alice so badly." He said, momentarily taking one of his hands form the wheel to brush it through his hair. Giving a long sigh, he added, "Being separated doesn't work well for either of us."

I could remember when being separated from a certain vampire got me worked up too. "I understand."

"Does it hurt when I talk about him?" he asked. He was paying no attention to the road, and it had been a while since I had been in a car. I gave him a pleading look and he focused on driving a little more while still waiting for my answer. "Well?"

I didn't really know how to answer this question, but I tried anyways. "I don't think it's talking about him that hurts, Jasper. I think it's more remembering him. The way he used to be. The way _we_ used to be. Does that make sense?"

"In some ways, yes. I guess I can see what you're talking about. I know I have said it before, but he does care for you. More than you know." I shrugged and we resumed our comfortable silence as we drove through anchorage and straight on to Denali. I closed my eyes and tried to quell the fear in my still heart.

"We're here." He murmured, and I felt the car slow. Dragging my eyes open, I was astonished to see that log cabins were not always little one room homes. This place was huge, with a clearing not unlike that of the house in Forks. Remembering why we were here, I looked around really quickly and noticed Jasper walking off in the opposite direction of the house. "Can you please find Tanya? Alice said she had the plane tickets." he had described her to me, so I knew what she looked like at least. I didn't understand why he wanted me to find her though until he gave me a look. "I haven't hunted in while, and right now I am on the trail of an Alice, and some deer." Nodding in understanding, I headed off towards the house.

I didn't know whether to knock or not, but before I even had to make the decision, a young man with a kind face and plenty of facial hair greeted me by opening the door. "You must be Eleazar." I said, holding my hand out but hoping he wouldn't take it. I wasn't trying to gain any friends, just some peace of mind. He did take it though, warmly shaking it and telling me he had heard about me.

"Do you know where Tanya is? I was supposed to get the plane tickets while Jasper hunts quickly."

"Yes, dear. She should be in her room. She went up there hours ago but I haven't heard her come out. Third room on the left." I thanked him and headed up the stairs.

The door wasn't all the way closed, and when I knocked it I accidentally pushed it open.

There, with his back to me, was Edward Cullen. I couldn't see his face, but that hair, all messy with her hands running through it while she murmured in his ear. She didn't stop speaking incoherent words to him while she moved her hands from his hair to his chest. Which was bare. Edward Cullen was sitting shirtless while a woman touched him. A woman wearing nothing but a pair of underwear. I felt like I was intruding, which, frankly, I was, but I couldn't look away. I knew Jasper had been lying. I heard a zipper being pulled down, and let out a sharp gasp. She stopped mumbling to him and stared at me.

"Excuse me, but I'm not exactly an exhibitionist, so unless you plan on joining us, I would be very pleased if you stopped staring." Edward didn't move at first, but all of a sudden turned and saw me.


	11. It's my Aeroplane

**Disclaimer: I own a copy of the soundtrack to spring awakening, and tickets to see Equus in October (oh my god!) thanks to Adam. But I don't own this.**

"Excuse me." I closed the door and hurried down the stairs. Or at least, I tried to hurry down the stairs. Ignoring the crashes I heard coming from Tanya's room that I assumed were coming from the two in the throws of love, I forgot to pay attention and ran smack in to Alice.

As soon as she realized that it really was me, she tried hugging me. Her tight squeezing embrace was matched by an awkward formal one. Pulling away, she quickly said "Edward will be coming out of that door in 5 seconds, so we should go. Unless you want to see him?" she looked hopeful. I grabbed her arm and pulled us both down the stairs, past the living room filled with curious strangers and Jasper, and out the door. After pushing her in the car, I got in and locked the doors, forgetting that simple metal locks would do no good if a vampire actually wanted to get in to a car that badly.

"If you touch my car I will rip your head off!" came the voice of Eleazar. I looked over towards the house and saw Edward trying to get out. Jasper and the brunette vampire, Kate?, got a hold of him and pulled him into the house. I could see Tanya looking down on the scene from a window on the second story, and had to look away. Alice was staring at me.

"So, you can't see me." It wasn't a question but more of a statement.

"No… " She said, looking thoughtful. "Well, sort of. If I focus on someone who is with you, I can see you. Like today, I focused on Jasper, and I could see you two driving here. But I can't see you by yourself." She looked me over. I changed the subject.

"So how has your life been, Alice? Have fun? Lots of shopping?" I was rambling, which I tended to do when I didn't know what to say.

"Bella," she sounded sad, and I knew what she was about to say. So I stopped her.

"Alice, don't apologize, and don't say you missed me and didn't want to leave me. I got enough of that from your husband. I only came to speak to Carlisle. So, would you mind telling me when our plane takes off?"

The hurt look on her face became more pronounced. "Three hours." She mumbled.

It hurt me in some small way to see that I had hurt her feelings. But the devil in me told me that what I did to her was only a fraction of what she did to me. "Alice," came Jaspers voice. She unlocked the doors and ran out to his embrace. He looked over at me, a sad look on his face. After releasing her, he walked over to me while she walked in to the house.

"I got Edward calmed down. I've explained everything to him and he knows to keep his distance unless you say otherwise. I'm not sure how long this newfound control will last, but Alice will foresee anything if he starts thinking up any ways to get to you." He spoke to me as if he was keeping a villain at bay. I knew it hurt him and Alice to treat him like that when it came to me, but I wasn't sure if I could actually handle speaking to him right now, especially after seeing him with the godly creation that was Tanya. "We should be on our way to Anchorage soon, since we will have to run. I'm going to say goodbye inside, you can come in if you want."

"I think I'll stay out here." Came my reply. He nodded and walked back into the house. I leaned against the car and closed my eyes. I didn't like this; I didn't like this at all. I tried not to listen to the conversations inside, but I could hear Tanya speaking to Edward about how much fun she had and she hoped to see him soon. I walked away so I didn't have to hear Edward's reply.

"Bella!" Alice's voice rang through the clearing. "Let's go!" she walked up to me and handed me a boarding pass. "You're lucky it's summer, because during the winter it is hard to get a plane to fly to Galena, especially one big enough to keep Edward and you separated."

"Where are Jasper and… Edward?" I asked as we ran.

"They should be leaving the house in a few minutes. I asked them to wait a little while so we could board without having to see them. I thought you might appreciate that." I did.

That was the last thing we said to each other before we got to the airport. Alice directed us towards the terminal, and waited in silence until they began to board us.

"Window or aisle, Bella?" she asked.

"_Aisle." I answered the lady behind the desk. She nodded and asked my payment method. I handed her enough cash to pay for the ticket and grabbed it before walking off. I noticed the people staring. Of course they would, but they would never approach me, and that is how I preferred it._

_Waiting until they started boarding the passengers, I marveled at how in all this time, this was the only thing I had splurged on. I opted for a first class seat because humans were too crammed in the coach and business sections, and I didn't feel like testing my limits today. I got up when I heard the announcement and walked towards the door. I had no luggage and nothing but my wallet and an airplane ticket. I handed the latter of the two to a stewardess who showed me to my seat._

_On the flight, while most people slept or watched an in-flight movie, I kept my eyes closed and tried not to think about what I knew I would. Edward and I in the meadow, Edward and I dancing at prom, Edward playing my lullaby._

_The plane landed and I rushed off, beating the rest of the passengers. I sprinted to the parking lot, slowing and acting natural when I reached it. Finding some foreign car that looked sleek and fast, I broke into it and hotwired it. As I drove I didn't think. I was truly an animal then, acting on pure desire and not having second thoughts about it._

_I ditched the car somewhere that people would be able to find it and alert the proper authorities. Walking through the street and towards the place I hoped would offer my salvation, I sighed. Hearing a movement, I looked to my left and saw a muscular man staring at me._

"_Bella."_

"Bella!" Alice pulled me out of my daydream.

"Sorry Alice, I was just remembering something, I'll take the window seat."

She nodded and then went in to a short trance. "We should get on the plane now or Edward and Jasper will be able to see us." She took my hand and pulled me towards the door.

**So the title of this chapter comes from the song Aeroplane by Red Hot Chili Peppers. Review! Reviewers get sneak peeks! :D**


	12. Afraid of Heights and Shooting Stars

**Disclaimer: I own one authentic Woodstock poster, which I am in love with and hung above my bed in my dorm room. Alas, I do not own this ******

I sat in my seat and stared at Alice. If I weren't an immortal I would be terrified. This so-called plane was a few pieces of metal and an engine. A rickety sounding engine. "This is what you call a large plane?"

"Bella, we're not flying in to JFK international. Galena's airport is tiny. Super tiny. This is a large plane when you put it next to all the tiny ones sitting in hangars there." She kept her eyes closed while saying this.

"Well, I just thought that when you told me I would be on the separate end of the plane from…Edward, I would actually be a safe distance from him." Edward was 10 rows away from me, and that was the farthest he could have been. I refused to look at him, but I knew he was looking over at me, because I kept hearing Jasper mutter his name under his breath, trying to get his attention.

"Don't tell me you're feeling claustrophobic, Bella." If her eyes had been open she would have rolled them. We're 20 minutes out, and then we can get away from the boy. Then we'll go to the house, you can ask your questions, and then you can be on your way." Her voice was stained with sadness by the time she finished speaking. I knew she didn't want me to leave, but I couldn't stay.

"I can't believe I'm actually going to see your family again. After all this time…"

"Well, if you didn't know them back then, you would think they were completely different people."

"How so?" I had heard about Carlisle, and also about how she and jasper had left the nest for the majority of time. But I hadn't really heard about their time.

"Well, the Emmett you knew was completely different from the one you'll meet today. He became more… destructive, I guess is the good word. We actually had to leave Ithaca when he got into a fight and the guy pulled a knife on him. Obviously, when the knife broke Carlisle moved the family to avoid suspicions. And Rosalie, she isn't the same. I think it was after she saw what Edward was going through that she realized how lucky she was. I mean, she had love. She got quieter and a lot less vain. She started appreciating Emmett. Surprised us all, really." She still hadn't opened her eyes and suddenly went very still.

All of a sudden she opened them and said warningly "Edward!" She didn't have to say it loud; we all knew he heard it. Letting out a low growl, he went back to staring at me.

"Sorry, he was about to get up and grab you. Had some idea of dragging you into the bathroom with him" I internally shuddered at the thought of being cramped in such a small space with him.

"We are 10 minutes away from landing, ladies and gentlemen, we hope you had an enjoyable flight and that you enjoy our small town of Galena." Came the voice of the pilot. Alice took my hand and squeezed it before letting go. It was a small gesture, but it was nice. I thought that there might be a chance I could forgive her with time.

My shortest chapter, and a bit anti-climactic.

But, I think I'm going to post another chapter before the day is through, so do not fret. However: rehearsal is calling my name, and I have to go before my director uses the damn understudy. So review so I have something to look forward to when I get home

Peace!


	13. Decisions based on Forgetfulness

**Disclaimer: I won one really grumpy kitty, Scrappy, who according to my mom hides in my room and doesn't want to come out…I guess he misses me ********. But I don't own this.**

Walking in to a house that was the stone version of the one in Forks, with more fireplaces, I felt out of place and intrusive. Alice called for Carlisle, and when he showed up she smugly said, "You spend a week trying to calm Edward down, to no avail. Jasper gets to him, says a few words, and the boy stops struggling and listens to us. What does that say about our father figure?"

He patted her on the head while looking up at me. Walking towards me he opened his mouth to speak.

"Bella! Oh my god, Bella." Esme pushed past her husband and held me tight. Her body shuddered with sobs she could not shed, and I patted her back while she mumbled unintelligible words. All I wanted to do was speak to Carlisle. Sure, I had missed Esme and her motherly personality. But she abandoned me, leaving with the rest of her family to escape my presence. "Hello Esme."

Carlisle had been conversing in hushed tones with Jasper. He walked over to us and gently pulled his wife off of me. "Bella, why don't we go to talk in my office? Or would you prefer somewhere else?" he held out his hand and I shook it.

"Your office would be fine." I looked over at Alice, but she was staring in to Jasper's eyes and I didn't think she would even notice me leaving the room.

Edward had walked in and sat down by his piano. He was fingering the keys, soft enough to not disturb the silence. I glanced at him before following Carlisle up the stairs.

The room was done in dark burgundy colors, and two soft looking leather chairs were paired together in a corner. Carlisle sat in one chair and motioned for me to sit in the other. Taking a seat, I looked down at my lap, too ashamed to actually show him my face.

"Bella," Carlisle said softly.

Not again. "Look, Carlisle. I don't know what Jasper or Alice have told you." I sighed. "I just need some answers."

"Alright, sounds fair. But in return, may I have some answers from you?"

I paused. I didn't know how I could get what I needed if I didn't give him something in return. "Sure."

"Ok, then. Shoot." Carlisle leaned back in his seat and looked at me expectantly.

"Why did Edward go to Volterra?"

"I would have hoped you understood that, Bella. He went to Volterra to die. He didn't want to be on this earth anymore. Edward has never dealt with depression well, and his hopelessness consumed him." Carlisle looked sad at this, but brushed the look off of his face. "Next?"

This next question, one that had haunted me for over 70 years. "have you ever heard of a vampire with memory problems?"

"What do you mean by that?" He sat up.

I ignored the playing of the piano floating up from downstairs. "I don't remember much. I remember my life before I was changed, but it's stuff that happened after. I don't remember anything. Not even who changed me."

"Vampires have impeccable memories. I have never heard of something like this." Carlisle stood up and walked towards the bookshelves, scanning the titles.

"The weird part is, I will be doing something and all of a sudden, I will just phase out and remember something I couldn't before." I closed my eyes and pinched the bridge of my nose. I heard Carlisle sit down in his chair again and I opened my eyes to see him mirroring my actions. Sighing, I said, "You were the only person I thought who might have an answer."

"I'm very sorry I don't, Bella. I would like to research this, since it could turn out that there are more cases of this. Although I have not run in to anyone else with this problem, I'm certain that there are others. Now," he asked, "is it my turn?"

I looked away and nodded. 'Just get this over with so you can leave' I told myself.

He placed his hand on top of mine. "You don't need anything? Please, let me do something."

I pulled my hand away from his. "I think your family has done enough. I am fine, but thank you for offering."

Never had I seen Carlisle hurt. I immediately felt guilty, and in a soft voice continued: "do you have any other questions for me, Carlisle?"

He blinked and looked back up at me. "I'm glad to see that you have golden eyes. I was afraid when I found out through Aro that you weren't dead that you were living off of humans."

It was hard at first. I hid out, leaving my hole only to hunt. After a while, I felt stronger, and got closer to humans. I did come very close to killing someone once. But I couldn't."

"What stopped you?"

"I don't remember." I felt broken because of my memory problems. "But, I've never drank from a human, and I have no plans to."

"That is a relief to hear."

"Anything else?" I ran a hand through my hair, and dimly wondered what the rest of the people in the house were doing, and if they were listening in.

Carlisle looked unsure, but smiled. "One more. Esme has missed you, more than you know. I know we hurt you. I'm not asking you to forgive me, but, as a husband watching out for the best interests of his wife, I beseech you to stay. Even if it is only for one night, I know it would mean the world to her. I will ask Edward to stay away from you, if that is what you'd like. But, Bella, please consider this." He looked hopeful.

I knew this would happen. And I knew that some small part of me wanted to stay. "Will you please ask Edward to keep his distance? If he agrees, I'll stay. Maybe just for the night, maybe a day or two longer. It all depends on his answer."

He stood up, smiling. "I'll speak to him now."

**MASSIVE headache. **

**Hope you guys liked the chapter.**

**You know the drill- 5 reviews, no less, and I post the next one.**

**Reviewers get sneakity peeks.**

**Peace!**


	14. Stories of Female Bonding

**Disclaimer: I own a copy of Jack Johnson's "Sleep through the Static" cd, and I am currently obsessed with it. But not this :(**

"You can stay here," Alice said, showing me to a guest room on the second floor. She had shown up mere seconds after I had told Carlisle of my decision to stay. She took my hand and pulled me into the room. Then, she turned back to the door. "Rosalie!" She yelled. "Get your pale skinny butt in here!" She turned back to me and smiled devilishly, "it's time for girl talk."

I groaned on the inside while, Rosalie, in all her otherworldly beauty, appeared and stared at me. Waving at her, I watched Alice lock the door and turn back to us. Jumping on the bed, she giggled and hugged me in a way that would have damaged organs had I still been human. It still felt weird to me, although I think I was getting used to it. Rosalie perched on the edge of the bed and smiled at me.

"Hello." It was the first word she had ever said to me, and I was surprised to find it wasn't dripping with disdain, but had a rather melancholy tone to it.

"Hi." I replied.

"Yes, yes, hi, hello, what's up." Alice poked her head up from our hug. She let go and I stretched, rubbing my ribs. "I'm so happy you decided to stay Bella, you have no idea how much we've missed you!"

"Yes, you all must have missed me so much after leaving me behind for the vultures to devour." I said sardonically.

"Bella," Rosalie's soft voice interrupted my inner ranting. "You can't really think we felt that way."

Of course I could. "Who are you to talk, Rosalie? You never treated me in a friendly manner. If I recall, you were about to let James rip me to pieces. So in my opinion, I am more than entitled to feel how I do. But hey, water under the bridge, right?"

"Bella." Alice looked close to tears, and Rosalie was staring down at her lap.

"And Alice, please, don't start. You say you didn't want to leave me? But, you did! Without so much as a proper goodbye, you packed up and left me!" my body was racking with dry sobs, but when Alice tried to hug me and I felt a hand I assumed was Rosalie's placed itself on my back, I pushed them away. After a while I heard the door open.

"Hey! Am I allowed to see her?" came Emmett's booming voice. Filled with hope and anticipation.

"Not right now, Emmett." Alice replied. The door closed again and I heard the two walk off. Opening my eyes and looking up, I saw that Rosalie hadn't left the room.

"I don't want to bother you anymore. But I would like to explain myself. I didn't hate you, Bella. I don't now either. Back then I hated myself. I saw how Edward looked at you, in a way he never looked at me. I know, I know, I have Emmett, but it was still strange for a man to not want me. I was a little jealous, because I didn't know what it was he saw in you that he preferred over me.

"I'm sorry for acting that way; in hindsight, it was extremely callous of me. I hope to make a new impression with you, if you would like." Her voice was hushed, but had an optimistic twang.

"I think that might work, but of course it all depends on how much time I spend here." I said, my voice not as shaky but still ruptured from my previous break down.

"Of course. That said, I think you need to talk to Edward."

Not this again. "Rosalie, not that I don't appreciate it, but I don't foresee that happening anytime soon. Besides, it's not like he wants me anyways." Saying that was like ripping my heart out and stabbing it repeatedly.

"And what makes you say that?" Rosalie raised one perfect eyebrow.

"The fact that I caught him and your friend Tanya together today." I explained the sight I saw in Denali today, and tried not picturing his perfect shirtless figure with hers. I could never compare. Not even as a vampire. But I was really surprised when Rosalie let out a snort and tried to hold in laughter.

"Bella, Tanya is a succubae. She finds her pleasure by seducing others. And frankly, she has been eyeing Edward since long before you came around. I'm a little shocked to hear she actually got his shirt off this time. Since he's a mind reader, he usually hears her intentions before she begins trying to seduce him and escapes. But just because some vixen tried getting into Edward's pants doesn't mean he doesn't want you." She rolled her eyes. "Trust me, he still wants you."

"I'm not sure I will be doing anything along the lines of trusting this family any time soon. But Rosalie, thanks for this talk. I do appreciate it." I got up off the bed and walked towards the door. "But now, I think it's time to find Esme."

We walked down the stairs together, and she stepped into the living room while I wandered off outside. I assumed I would find her in the greenhouse Alice had told me about on the plane, and I was right.

Looking up at me Esme said "I told Carlisle I just couldn't live somewhere where I could only garden for two months a year, so he had this built for me. Handy little greenhouse." Her warm motherly smile made her face glow as she stood up and brushed dirt off of her knees. She walked over to me and embraced me again. This time, I hugged her back.

"Do you need any help?" I asked. "I don't know much about plants, but I know how to weed and water things."

She said she would be glad to have help in here because her children were seldom interested in plants of any sort. We spent the few hours until darkness in the greenhouse, with her telling stories of the past 70 years and me listening intently. I didn't have many stories to share with her, since I could remember so little. Once darkness fell she proposed we go clean up. "Bella, I can't tell you enough how happy I am to see you once again." She took my hand and squeezed it before we entered the house.

I told her I felt the same, and walked up to the guest room. Entering the bathroom, I found a change of clothes, compliments of Alice I was sure. I stripped and stepped into the shower, feeling the water hit me in a tepid temperature, even though I had it turned to the highest it could go. I washed my hair, wishing for a moment that my shampoo was strawberry scented, and then turned the water off.

I dried myself and changed into the new clothes. Tying my wet hair into a messy bun, I walked back into my room.

"Bella." Edward's voice came from the far corner of the room.


	15. The Eyes that Betrayed

**Disclaimer: I own a chocolate Labrador monster that thinks he is still a puppy; his name is Snickers. But I don't own this.**

Edward was in my room. All of three paces away. "Bella." His voice was shaky, and he sounded as if he had been crying. "Oh, Bella."

I stared at him before moving to the bureau on the opposite side of the room from him. Sitting on top of it I whispered, "You shouldn't be in here." Edward nodded and stood up; as he slowly made his way towards the door I added "That doesn't mean you have to leave. I think after seventy years, we should have a little chat." I didn't want him in the room with me but I did. I didn't want to listen to him but I couldn't help myself.

He turned to me then, and walked towards the bed. Sitting on the edge of it, he was closer to me but still kept his distance. "You know, today was the first time in almost a century that I played the piano. Every time I thought about playing, it would remind me of your lullaby, and I just couldn't. I would remember humming it to you, watching you sleep." He shuddered. I couldn't see it in the darkness of the room lightened only by the moonlight, but I knew he was crying.

"Edward, I don't understand why you're crying." Part of me wanted to go up to him, comfort him, hold him. But another part of me was confused. "No one told you that you had to leave. You left because you wanted to. Because you didn't want me."

Faster than I could blink, Edward was standing next to me, holding my hands and looking down in to my eyes. I could see longing in them, and even after all this time, they made me melt. "Bella, please don't tell me you have spent the last seventy something years believing that." seeing my answer in my face, he looked even more pained than I had ever seen him. "I could never stop loving you. For me, you have always been the reason that the sun rises and sets each day. I lied to you Bella. I thought that the dangers I put you in every day outweighed the love I felt for you. I couldn't see you hurt. It would have killed me." There was almost no space between us.

"Edward," I whispered, pulling away slightly, but letting him keep my hands. "When you left, it hurt me more than anything else. I felt like I was broken and that no one would ever want me. I stopped speaking to people; I stopped interacting with them at all. The last few months of my life were marred by the fact that I had to spend them thinking that I could never be loved. That I had it, and then had it ripped away from me."

Edward stayed quiet through my soliloquy, looking down at the floor and occasionally shuddering. "Edward. The thing that hurt even worse than that was that you took my family from me."

"After Jasper attacked you, I saw how truly fragile you were. I needed to keep you safe and that was the only way I knew how. I will spend the rest of my existence making up for it, begging you for your forgiveness. But unless you want otherwise, I plan on never leaving your side again. I knew what leaving you did to me, but now I see what it did to you." His eyes showed his honesty.

There wasn't much I could say to that at this time. "Edward, I don't have an answer for you right now. I just… need some time." He nodded and cupped one hand on my cheek, caressing it for a brief moment that both went on forever and ended too soon. He then swiftly walked out the door, closing it quietly behind him. I lay down on the bed, trying to dig my way through the covers and get myself lost in them. I didn't often wish for the power to sleep, but right now I did. I lost myself in my thoughts until the sun shone through the windows. Pulling myself up, I got out of the bed and looked over at myself in the mirror. My hair was a rat's nest, and it took me almost 20 minutes to get it to look right.

"Bella," Carlisle's voice sounded through the door. "Esme and I are going to hunt, and then I'm off to work. Do you need anything?"

"No, thank you though Carlisle." I said, opening the door and walking with him down the stairs. Edward sat near the entrance, bent over his piano and playing the tune I remembered as Esme's favorite.

Alice chose that moment to walk through the kitchen door. Looking quickly between Edward and I, her face lit up and she skipped off yelling for Jasper. I was happy I couldn't blush. I said goodbye to Esme and Carlisle, wishing them well on their hunt. As they exited, I noticed Edward stealing a glance at me. Still happy I didn't blush anymore, I walked towards the living room and sat down in front of the television.

I felt pressure on my lap, and looked down to find Emmett laying his head there. "Hi there, clumsy. Seems to me it was only yesterday that you were mopping the floor with your face." The damn boy always could make me smile.

"And it seems like only yesterday that you would be tripping me so that I did these face plants." I was also happy I had lost my clumsiness. He shrugged and sat up next to me. Wiggling his eyebrows and motioning towards Edwards figure, he made kissy noises and earned a slap over the head from Rosalie, who walked in and sat on his lap.

"Thank you for that, Rose." Edward called. "I didn't feel like getting up."

**See? I promised that everyone's favorite hero would get a chance to explain himself!**

**5 reviews: next chapter. Reviewers get sneak peaks :)**


	16. Of Birds, Bees, and Bears

**Disclaimer: I own a really cool poster of Bob Dylan that is hanging over my desk at my house. But so far, I don't own this.**

"What I want to know is why you didn't see Edward deciding to go into my room." Alice, Jasper and I were hunting, since it had been a while since I had hunted and they had worked up a thirst somehow.

Alice looked wryly at her husband, and then turned back to me. "I was a little preoccupied last night. And besides, you can't tell me you aren't glad I didn't stop him." Her smug tone of voice almost made me want to slap her. But only almost.

"You know, Bella. I can feel you again, and your emotions are so completely different from when I first saw you." Jasper was sniffing around for something to eat. "You feel, healthier, almost. Difficult to explain." In an instant he was off, and Alice and I closely followed the scent.

Taking down a group of deer, we felt satiated and started walking back towards the house. "You know, I thought that piano was going to get dusty before Edward ever touched that thing again. I have to admit, it's nice to hear."

"If you thought that that thing would get dusty with Esme in the house, you are sadly mistaken, dear." Jasper reached out and took her hand, and I felt the love flowing out of both of them. One didn't need a power to feel that.

We were almost to the house when we heard a crash and saw Emmett and Edward racing through the trees. Edwards face practically glowed when he saw me and he opened his mouth to speak to us. But before he could, Emmett pushed him to the ground and yelled about how he was losing. The two ran off quickly.

"They're going hunting." Rosalie said, a smile playing at her lips. She walked towards us from the house, shaking her head at the wake of destruction the competitive boys left.

_My throat burned with thirst. I kept thinking of going to get water, but remembered that it wouldn't help and I would have to bring it back up later. So, I began to run. I knew that if I got anywhere near humans I would lose myself and attack, so I ran in the opposite direction of the road._

_Smelling the most delicious thing I had ever encountered, I took off running towards it and blacked out. The next thing I knew I was looking around at a herd of dead deer and I had blood all over myself. I sat there for hours, amid the animal's carcasses, hating myself for taking the lives of innocent animals._

"What?" Alice's surprised voice broke my train of thought and I was dragged back to the present.

"Why do you sound so surprised, Alice? Every vampire needs to hunt, it's only nature." I couldn't hide my confusion. Rosalie laughed.

"Edward has refused to hunt with us for the longest time. He would only hunt alone, and only close to home. It was quite pathetic, actually." She looked over at me. "Emmett is just happy to have someone to wrestle with again. He was getting a bit dejected from not upsetting Esme or breaking something in such a long time."

I had to laugh at that. Taking Alice's hand, we walked together back to the house, Jasper and Rosalie following us. Before long, Emmett and Edward came back in as well, Emmett complaining about how Edward tricked him into giving up his grizzly. Edward just smiled wickedly at him and turned to me. Without saying anything, he came and sat in the chair opposite of mine.

"Ooh La La!" Emmett cooed. "Come on, guys, we should give the two squirts a little privacy. Lord knows I don't want to be around to see my brother in the buff."

I threw a pillow at him. "Emmett, don't call me a squirt and don't make assumptions at to what we're going to be doing, got it?"

"Wow, someone is a temperamental little squirt, isn't she?" Emmett joked and ruffled my hair. I stuck my tongue out at him and Rosalie rolled her eyes. All four of them walked out, leaving Edward and I alone together.

"So, how was your hunt?"

Edward grinned up at me, pleased to see I was starting a conversation. "Well, Emmett went after a grizzly, but I was always the faster one, so I got to it first. Let's just say he wasn't too pleased." His grin turned into the crooked smile that always made me weak in the knees. "How about you?"

"Uhm, just some, uh, deer." Damn him and his dazzling. I can't believe I lost my train of thought just because he smiled at me. What sort of dismal person was I?

"Good, good." He murmured, his golden eyes smoldering. We stared at each other for an immeasurable amount of time.

A loud crash from upstairs took us both out of out stupor and made me jump in shock.

**Okay, so, I know nothing really big happened this chapter, but next chapter I promise there will be something.**

**Shout out to my favorite reader im.dazzled for just being amazing.**

**5 reviews and you get a new chapter…so c'mon you know you want a sneak peek ******


	17. Rotting Strawberries

Disclaimer: I own a birthday card that I read every time I feel down. But I don't own this.

Edward and I both shot up out of our seats and ran up the stairs. I noticed the front door was wide open, but ignored this in my hurry to find out what happened.

Edward was standing at the door to Rosalie's room, a dour look on his face. I peeked in from behind him and saw a Strawberry blonde beauty squeezing Rosalie. A table lay in broken pieces right near them. Jasper was shaking hands with Eleazar and Alice was watching all of this with her own unpleasant face. She looked at Edward, and he nodded slightly.

"Edward, Bella!" Tanya came over and enveloped the both of us in a hug while Rosalie and Emmett cleaned up the mess. Letting go, she winked at Edward and her smile faltered when she mentioned, "you two were staring so hard at each other that you didn't even notice us come in." I swore I saw Edwards smile get a little smug then. But then she took him by the hand and let him out towards the hallway. "Show me where I'll be sleeping, Edward."

I waited until it was just Rosalie and I. "See?" I hissed. She just nodded her head with a glint in her eyes. I let out a frustrated sigh. We walked downstairs together where we all waited for Carlisle and Esme to return home. Esme was happy as she always was to have guests, and Carlisle warmly greeted them and they started reminiscing about old times.

Excusing myself, I walked up to my bedroom and lay face down on top of my bed. I wasn't sure of my feelings for Edward, but I definitely knew I didn't want him with Tanya. If those two got together, there was no way in hell that I would be staying here. I would just go back to Forks where up until a week or so ago nothing dangerous or odd happened to me (not including when I was still a human, which I pushed out of my mind). Forks! I had totally forgotten and needed to speak to Jacob. No matter how angry he was with me, I know he would want to know I was safe.

I got out of the bed and straightened my clothes. Running down stairs, I asked Alice if I could use her cell phone, and took it outside with me. Esme had put an Adirondack bench out there, and I didn't exactly want to be calling a werewolf in front of a vampire family.

"Wussup?" Jeez, couldn't Jacob answer his own phone? "Hello Embry, I need to talk to Jake please."

"Whoa, vampire chick! We totally thought they would have tortured you to well… more than death by now! Tell me, Bella, do you guys have like secret vampire bonda-"

"God Embry, as much as I just love talking to you when you're drunk, be a good boy and hand the phone to Jacob." I sighed. Humans and their stupid alcohol. I heard the phone being handled roughly and then the sound of air passing by the receiver. Jacob coughed in my ear and before he even got a chance to speak, I lashed out.

"Jacob Ephraim Black! If you are drinking, so help me-"

"Very nice, Bells. I see the amount of faith you have in me. Is everything all right? Haven't smelled you around town. Embry thought the Cullen's would have killed you by now." He burped.

"Very Mature, Jake. I think everything is all right, I mean, I'm alive and I haven't been terrorizing anything, so I would think that would mean I'm ok. But I'm uh… in Alaska." I hoped he wouldn't understand what that meant.

"Very cool, very cool. Dog sledding and what-not?"

"Uh, not exactly. I'm visiting some old friends." I closed my eyes.

"Excuse me? Blondie dragged you over there, didn't he? Are you sure you don't want me to come up there and handle this? Kidnapping is against the law you know!" I could hear growling on his end. "Bella, let me bring some of the pack up there to help you, please."

I almost had to laugh. "No Jake, you and the pack stay in Forks. I don't know how long exactly I'll be gone, but I knew you would, eventually anyways, worry about me. If anything happens, you will be the first person I call."

"Tell me he isn't-"

"He is. And yes, before you ask, it is awkward. And no, before you ask, I haven't forgiven him. So don't get your panties in a twist and let me be a big girl. I do, to some extent, know how to protect myself without a bunch of werewolves surrounding me." I teased.

"Yeah, yeah. Ok. Just give me a call if you need anything."

"Will do. Bye, mutt." I smiled to myself. He said goodbye too and I hung up the phone. Leaning back against the bench for a minute, I closed my eyes and remembered myself falling in love, kind of, with the boy wolf. And then I was a vampire. I frowned and tried again to remember the circumstances under which I was changed, but I couldn't

Sighing, I walked over to the door, and went back into the living room to hand Alice her phone. I was greeted by 10 vampires with shocked expressions on their faces. As usual, Carlisle was the first to clear his head and he spoke up.

"Bella, you're friends with a pack of werewolves?"

**More Bella Edward action next chapter!**

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	18. Big Bad Wolf

**Disclaimer: so I don't own twilight, but if she's in a giving mood, I'd be wiling to take it off Steph's hands. ******

Damn vampires and their super sensitive hearing. I mean, I know I had it too, but I forgot all about it. Pushing my hair away from my face, I looked only at Carlisle and nodded.

"And they haven't hurt you in any way?"

"No. They got their claws into Jasper though." Alice looked at him and I could see she was seething. He gave me a look. "Don't worry, Alice, he didn't get hurt either, which you can obviously see."

Carlisle walked up to me. "What I don't understand is why they didn't just rip you apart when they found you."

I was fidgeting with the hem of my shirt, and I knew the entire living room would find it weird when I spoke. "I became friends with them while I was still human. They were trying to protect me from…"

"From whom, Bella?" Carlisle placed a hand on my shoulder.

This was frustrating. "I…I can't remember."

"It's ok, don't push yourself. I thought that the wolf gene had died off in them, but obviously I was wrong. First Jasper mentions them to me in passing, and then Eleazar, now you. Did you know that they were wolves when you befriended them?"

"Uhm, actually, I was friends with a lot of them before they even changed." As soon as I said this, I wished I hadn't. Edward stared straight at me and shot up put of his chair.

"I ask you to protect yourself and you run off and put yourself in the hands of young, irresponsible, volatile werewolves?" he looked more like one of the film vampires than ever. When I nodded he walked into the kitchen. Esme put her hand on his shoulder to try to stop him, but he shrugged it off.

"They never attacked you? When you were human I mean?"

I wanted to say no, but I remembered Paul lunging at me, his teeth bared and pure hatred in his eyes. "I was never hurt." It was better than lying. Carlisle nodded and smiled at me. I could see him quell the curiosity and he went to return to his seat.

"My, my, what an oddity we have here. Can't remember her past, runs around with our sworn enemies. You truly are one of a kind, Bella." It was funny, but Tanya's words didn't seem like a compliment to me. I thanked her anyway, not wanting to sound rude. I wondered where she picked up the knowledge about my memory issues. I would have to have a talk with Carlisle later. "How was the trip?"

Carmen answered, speaking to me for the first time. "Well, if Tanya didn't feel the need to bring so much crap with her, the trip here would have been much more enjoyable." Tanya rolled her eyes, and then got up to walk to the kitchen. I could see Alice shoot up in the corner of my eye and run in there. God bless that little pixie. Carmen smiled at me. "But, luggage aside, I am more than pleased to see my good friends again. It has been much too long." The Cullens all smiled, and Esme gave her apologies for not visiting them.

I heard a crash from the kitchen, and Alice poked her head out. Her eyes were wide and she gave Esme a look that begged her not to kill her. Tanya strode out, a displeased look on her face, and she shot me a glare when everyone else was looking towards Esme.

"Esme, mother, now, remember that once you kill me, you wont be able to bring me back, and then Jasper will be very upset and wreak havoc on everyone's emotions for the rest of time." If she could sweat, she would have been doing that then.

"Dear lord, what did you break?" Esme rushed past her smallest child into the kitchen. The rest of us, minus Tanya, followed. There, we found an Edward shaped hole in the window, and a broken cup. "She sighed and went to the cabinet, pulling out a phonebook. "Alice, do I even want to know?"

Alice shook her head, leaning against Jasper. "No, Esme, I'm pretty sure this is one of those things you should be glad you don't know." She looked at me and I saw it in her eyes. We had to talk.

Filing back into the living room, I wondered where Edward was. I guessed I would get the answers from Alice. Rosalie placed herself on Emmett's lap and looked over at Carmen. "Why didn't Kate or Irina join you?"

Carmen's face showed a little sadness, but not much. She waited until she had sat next to Eleazar and he put his arm around her. "Irina lost her love, and in a twist of irony, her mate died at the hands of Bella's wolf friends. Laurent told her that he wanted to go down to Forks to visit the Cullen's, but he never returned. We found out that the wolves killed him, and poor Irina just hasn't been the same. Kate stayed with her so she didn't decide to do anything stupid."

Carlisle looked surprised. "His name was Laurent? Eleazar never mentioned that." Looking at me, he added, Bella, do you remember Laurent?"

I nodded. He was the least dangerous of the three nomads, but still. "After you left, Laurent found me one day and tried to kill me. The wolves got to him first though." I noticed Tanya take interest when I said this.

Eleazar looked a bit uncomfortable. "Laurent was having some problems adjusting to this lifestyle. But it's to be expected. After you spend so long feasting off of humans…well." He gave a wry smile. "Was it hard for you to deprive yourself?"

"I've never tasted a humans blood before, and I don't hope to start now." I smiled at him. He was quiet, but very nice. He reminded me a bit of Jasper, only older and with a slight Mediterranean accent.

"Actually, speaking of hunting, Bella and I were about to go." Alice said, squeezing Jaspers hand and leaving his embrace. She walked over to me and grabbed me. But we'll be back shortly."

**Blah blah review blah blah sneak peeks blah blah 5.**

**Late for class, because Ireally wanted to get this chapter finished lol :D**


	19. Muddy Daughters

**Disclaimer: I own one used copy of World Civilizations (fourth edition), which I am holding on my lap and pretending to read, and yes, I am writing another chapter in class (bad girl!). But, I don't own this.**

"Why would you throw him out the window, Alice? What was he doing?"

She shrugged as we walked through the back yard and towards the trees. "I saw something I knew would upset you if it happened, so I went to warn Edward. Let's just say he let Tanya get her claws into him and even when I tried to snap him out of his stupor, which explains the broken cup, he wouldn't budge. So, I did what I had to." She turned towards me and sighed. "Make up your mind yet?"

I was about to give her my answer, or, rather, non-answer, when I was interrupted. "Can I speak with you alone?" Edward was staring at me.

I looked towards Alice, only to see her running away. Some help she was. Edward cleared his throat and I looked back at him, scared but not unwilling to talk to him. "I guess you have your answer."

He closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose. "Bella. I asked you, I made you promise me not to put yourself in any dangerous situations. And then I leave, and you find the worst possible creatures to be around. Explosive, volatile werewolves. What happened to what you promised me?"

How dare he speak of promises. "What happened? Well, you weren't one for keeping your promises, so I felt that all bets were off. Edward Cullen, you promised to stay with me! What happened to_ that_ promise? You promised that I would never have to see you again! What happened to that promise? Every single time I closed my eyes, I saw you! And here you are, berating me for not keeping _my_ promises? You have some nerve!" I was staring straight at him, and I had never seen such shock in his eyes. Or pain; if I had been Jasper, I might have broken down from all the pain I could see lingering there.

I felt arms around me, but they were not Edward's. "Eddie boy, I think now isn't a good time for talking. Maybe after Bella has gone off the rag. Or better yet, when you don't have an audience." Emmett, always one to joke during a difficult situation. I squeezed one of his arms and was thankful for having him near me now. I would have broken into dry sobs at any moment had he not stopped me.

Edward simply looked at him, and then nodded and walked into the house, past the spectators neither of us had noticed. Alice was walking out of the woods with a stunned expression on her face and straight into the arms of her husband. I left Emmett's embrace, and walked in to the woods.

"_You promised me!" I could hear a tortured female voice coming from the other side of the door._

"_Yes, but one should know never to make a promise with one of us." Came the voice of one of the three. I looked at the man standing next to me, Felix. "What's going on in there?"_

_He had almost a pained look on his face. " They are… erm… firing one of out receptionists. I heard more screams and rose on eyebrow at him. His pained expression became more pronounced. "She knows too much, and as a human it would be easier to get rid of her this way." Felix looked away from me then, and I realized it; he had loved this woman, or at least cared for her in some way._

_I remembered a vampire once caring for a little human girl. He left, and she died. The end._

I punched a tree. I had never before been very keen on destroying innocent plants, but now found that it could be a great stress reliever. Stupid Edward Stupid Cullen! I didn't know why he insisted on torturing me this way, but it was highly effective in getting a rise out of me, in more ways than one.

I needed to get out of here. Out of this House, out of this town, the state, even. I had brief thoughts of leaving to go to South America, but put them out of my head quickly. I doubted I could leave Forks again. The rain fell on my face and into my eyes, and I felt like I was crying. Sinking to the floor, I leaned against a tree and dry sobbed. It was a very long time until I felt someone pick me up. The air rushing past me meant that whoever was holding me was running, and I soon felt the warmth of a fireplace. Opening my eyes, I saw that I was in Carlisle's office, and he was looking at me with relief on his face. "You seemed almost catatonic, Bella."

Oh the memories that dredged up. "Dr. Gerandy used catatonic to describe me during those first few weeks after you left." I sat up and looked down at the mud all over me. "I should clean up, or your couch will be ruined."

He simply waved it off. "What's a couch compared to a… daughter?" not friend, but daughter?

"Carlisle, look, I really don't think I can stay. This has turned out to be a lot harder than I anticipated." I was really sad to have to say this to him, but it was true.

He stood up from his seat and walked over to where I was sitting. Kneeling down in front of me, he took my hands in his own. "Bella. I know this can't be easy. It has to be like visiting a bad memory every second of the day. But staying with us has to be better than living as you have; completely alone, with no comfort or joy or familial love."

"It's been working fine so far."

"I know you are hurting. I know we've hurt you. But I am also not a fool. Almost five hundred years old, I think I may have learned a thing or two in all that time. And in the past day and a half, I have seen the way you look at Edward. And yes, some of the time it is with a look of utter pain, and other times of uncertainty. But then I catch you looking at him with love, too. And even if you don't feel it now, I know it is in there, hibernating until you choose to wake it." He got closer and hugged me. "And Alice and Emmett have been so glad to have their sister. Rosalie has been looking forward to making amends, and Jasper is excited because he finally can get to know you without having to stay on the other side of a room or near an open window. Esme and I, we have a daughter back, a daughter we lost due to one of the most horrible mistakes of our existences. I have a feeling you want to just jump up and leave, but please, stay for a little while longer."

How could I say no to that? I had no choice.

"Thank you, Bella. It means a lot to the entire family." I stood up to leave.

"How long will the other coven be here?" I needed to know how long I would have to put up with Tanya.

"It's up in the air. Maybe a week, maybe three days. Maybe a half-month. We'll have to wait and see."

Damnit.

**So… what did you think?**

**Review… yea yea the five review rule is still in effect.**

**Although, with all these hits I'm seeing, I may make it 10 soon, although only time will tell..**


	20. Bedtime Stories

**Disclaimer: I own a crap cell phone that doesn't want to work right now (GAH!). But I don't own this. Poo.**

My room was dark with the nighttime when he came in. I had expected it, and I didn't make any move to get up or leave when he opened the door and shut it just as gently. I simply laid in my bed and waited for him to speak.

"Bella?"

"Yup?" I let the 'p' pop.

Feeling pressure towards the edge of the huge bed, I knew that he had sat down. "I'm sorry."

I had also expected this. "You've apologized. Numerous times. So you must have come in here for some other reason." I closed my eyes and tried to fall asleep, although I knew I never would.

"No." his soft voice sounded strained. "Just to apologize. But this time it is for a different reason."

"Go on."

"Bella, I had no idea. I just, I assumed that as a human you would get over me. I know now that what you felt for me was much more complex than a normal human's feelings for a lover."

Sitting up, I decided not to make this as easy on him as I was about to. After all, how easy had he made the last 70 years of my life? "Well, you know what they say happens when you assume."

I saw him wave his hand. "Something ridiculous about buttocks. But that isn't it, Bella. Please. You were the only thing I ever saw in my mind. Ask the family. I hated myself even more than before for doing what I did to you. After I thought you must have died, I didn't want to live at all. So I went to Volterra and asked them to destroy me." He shuddered then. "I was so weak, I couldn't even think of what my family wanted or what it would do to Esme. All I knew was that you weren't here on this planet anymore, and I wanted to leave it because of that. How much of a selfish pig am I?"

"Couldn't have said that better myself." Where was this animosity coming from? I tried brushing it away. "Anything else, Edward?"

At first he didn't say anything. I leaned against the pillows, waiting for an answer. "I'm so, I'm just so tired, Bella." He collapsed.

Alarmed, I jumped off the bed and knelt by his body. Shoving his shoulder gently, I whispered his name. He was shaking so hard. I could see his body racking with sobs. "Edward, it's ok. Breathe." I actually had to suppress a giggle at this. He had always been the one telling me to breathe.

He turned his face to me, and I knew he wanted to say something. I nodded my head to urge him to speak. "How can it be ok? The girl of my dreams, the only person I will ever care for doesn't return the love. Perhaps you are Rosalind; the thing that scares me is that I know for a fact that there will never be a Juliet to make me forget about you, and I will be destined to wander this earth mourning your indifference." He lay himself down on the bed, and it made me long for the days before the Cullen's left. The days where Edward would hold me on my bed while I dreamt sweet dreams of him.

"Don't say that, Edward. Really. Maybe there is a Juliet out there for you." Maybe that Juliet was me, but I didn't remember Will writing about Romeo leaving her and causing her pain that drove her to the edge. The feelings I was feeling right now made no sense considering what I had felt for him for seventy years. I wanted to hold him, have him hold me, do things with him that would have made me blush had I still been human. But a part of me- granted, a part that was growing smaller by the hour- wanted to scream and throw things. I think I foresaw that the loving part of me won in the battle between the two. And so I said something without even thinking it. "Edward, maybe I am your Juliet, but it isn't so easy to forgive you. I need time."

I saw hope in his ocher eyes. "But there's a chance? Right?"

"Maybe. But I just need some time. Please give this to me."

Edward nodded and sat up. "I will give you everything you want, Bella. Everything and anything." He whispered. Brushing his fingers on my cheek once more, he stood and left, letting me be consumed by my thoughts.

Lost in my daydreams of the two of us together, I didn't notice it when the door opened again. "Edward?" I said, looking up. If it was anyone, I was sure it would be him.

"I'll give you one more guess." Came a sugary sweet voice. I shot up off my bed.

"Tanya?" Why the hell would she be in my room?

"Good, you got it right. Now claim your prize." She walked up to me, and I heard the low hiss in her voice.

"Something bothering you, Tanya?"

"Why, yes. Bella, I think something _is_ bothering me. I think it might be that you are going to mess Edward up even more than he's already been messed with. After you entered his life, he ran off to me! Yelling about some demon that had been sent to torture him. You'll understand why I was surprised when he began that affair with you. And it was a happy day when the Cullens showed up saying that they had had to leave Forks because Edward wanted to leave you. I thought that I would get my chance. But of course not, because the poor boy was so out of sorts when he showed up that he could hardly place two words together to form a sentence."

"And you think that that is my fault? Check your math, Tanya, because it was Edward who wanted to leave me." All of this was said in a hushed growl. I didn't know what anyone else in the house was doing, but I knew I didn't want to disturb them and have them see a friend fighting with me; I didn't know who they would side with.

"If you hadn't shown up to Forks in the first place, he would never have lost himself."

"Tanya, if she had never shown up, he would have never found himself." Rosalie's voice sounded. We both looked to see the door was open and was framing her silhouette. "Now, you are going to leave Bella alone so she can have some peace. And you and I are going to have a little chat." With that said, she went to go take Tanya's hand, but she yanked it away and stalked out of the room. Giving me a grim smile, Rosalie followed, closing the door quietly.

Bloody Hell.

**Well well, I don't think I'm going to make it 10 reviews, because that would mean I would have to wait longer lol. So, it's still 5 reviews equals a new chapter. Give them up. There has to be something you would like to say about this chapter.**

**And my throat is KILLING me…I feel like I should hunt :P**


	21. Little Red Riding Heart

**Disclaimer: I met the highest llama, his accent sounded fine to me. If you don't own a copy of vampire weekend's debut cd, then you seriously need to go get one. I own one, but I don't own this. Oh well.**

**And uh… almost 3000 views in less than a week? SWEET**

I had no idea what to expect the next morning as I left my room.

Rosalie was smiling at me, and Alice was scowling at Tanya; I could only guess that she had either seen the events from last night in her head or Rosalie had filled her in. Jasper could feel weird emotions coming off of Tanya and I, so he must know something was up. Emmett was, of course, Emmett. Clueless and carefree. Carmen and Eleazar were looking at each other all lovey dovey, and Alice informed me when I asked that Carlisle and Esme had not yet come from their bedroom.

Sneaking a look at Edward, I could tell he was as clueless as Emmett as to what had gone down between Tanya and I last night. Both she and Rosalie must have had other things on their minds. As if to prove my hypothesis right Edward let out a loud groan.

"Rosalie, must you?"

"Well, you really shouldn't go peeking into others minds without their permission then." She smirked at him.

"Do you think I want to see the filth produced in your mind? I don't have a button to switch it off, and it is most awkward to see Emmett doing these types of things. Please." Edward begged her.

"What kinds of things were you imagining me doing, Rose?" Emmett wiggled his eyebrows suggestively, and she adjusted herself on her lap.

"Want to find out?" she stage whispered

Before she could get an answer, we heard their bedroom door closing and saw nothing but an imprint of Emmett's behind on the seat. All of us laughed, even Tanya, although hers was bittersweet. Edward and Jasper kept playing their video games while Alice painted her nails, occasionally trying to get to Jaspers toes. I giggled as I thought of Jasper Hale with deep purple toenails, and everyone looked at me momentarily until I waved them off.

Just then, Alice's phone rang. "I was not expecting that." Alice said, confused. Answering it, she frowned. "Hold on, mutt." Holding the phone out to me, she added, "It's the wolf boy."

"Hello? Jake?" why would he be calling here?

"I had no other way of getting in touch with you. So I used star 69. Look, I think that you should get back here."

"Why?"

"Because apparently your school started to worry when you weren't showing up, so they went to the address you had listed as your home. Apparently the dingy little one room apartment looked suspicious to them." He sighed, sounding frustrated. "I got someone there to believe that it is your absentee fathers address, but they want to know if you are gone from the school or alive or not."

"Huh. Absentee father, huh?" How was I going to tell him this?

"What aren't you telling me?" Damn. I knew he would catch me putting things off.

"Well, you see, I may be out of town for a little longer than anticipated…" I trailed off. I wasn't looking forward to another Jacob Black explosion, especially not in a room filled with vampires.

"Alright, so I guess I'm going to have to drop the hint that you've moved somewhere." That was it? Something was up.

"What aren't you telling _me_?" I was suspicious.

There was a pause. And then, after sighing exaggeratedly, "I met a girl." If I wasn't a vampire I wouldn't have even heard him.

"Oh." Then recognition dawned on me. "Oh! Jake, I'm really happy for you!" looking up, I surveyed the scene. The two boys had disregarded their game controllers, and Alice looked up at me. Carmen and Eleazar had stopped acting like hormonal teenagers and were very interested in the conversation. Tanya was astutely ignoring me, however. "But, uh, Jacob, I think I'm going to have to go. I'll call you when I figure out when I'm coming back, ok?"

"Sure, sure. Speak to you soon." He hung up the phone.

"Well, now that the werewolf has imprinted, I'm sure he will be much too busy to hog your phone lines, Alice." I said, handing her phone back. "And what are you all staring for? It's not like we go out for pizza or anything? We were just close before I changed, and you can't ruin a friendship over something like natural instincts to kill one another." I joked. Jasper and Edward returned to playing their video games, and Alice got up to get acetone, since she decided her nail polish wasn't the right shade of eggplant. Tanya stared at me for a little longer, contempt oozing out of her essence. I felt bad for Jasper; he must be trying hard to rub those feelings off of himself.

"Good morning." Carlisle said as he entered the room, his arm around Esme. "Carmen, Eleazar, would you like to go for a hunt with us?" the two guests said that it would be lovely and walked from the room.

Tanya was staring at me. The boys were so consumed by their video game, I was sure they couldn't see her. Her eyes had a glint to them; as if she was bout to do something wicked. Someone behind me cleared their throats, unnecessarily, since vampires don't need to clear their throats.

Both of us looked behind me to see Rosalie draped in a sheet to cover her dirty bits, and Alice. "Tanya, do you want to go downtown? There aren't many shops there, but there are some."

Edward looked up at Alice "Alice, why are you reciting the pledge of allegiance in French and backwards?" he said, confused.

"All the better to keep you out of my head, dear brother." She said. Patting him on the head and kissing Jasper quickly, she grabbed Rosalie. "Tanya?"

The strawberry blonde beauty stood up. "I think I will just retire to my room. Thank you for the invite though." She swiftly walked out.

"What's eating her?" Jasper whispered, not once taking his eyes of the television.

Alice, Rosalie and I rolled our eyes.

**I went to the infirmary really early this morning (around 3ish) and apparently I have flu like symptoms. And I have major rehearsals before this damn play (beauty and the beast) in three weeks, so I'm screwed. And to top it all off, I'm the fucking lead, and I have a major beef with my understudy (stupid cow), and I don't know how I'm going to tell my director he needs to use her for the rest of this week. It will give her too much satisfaction. GROWL!**

**Review and cheer me up, please.**

**5 until the next chapter, reviewers get sneak peeks.**


	22. Forget What You've Heard

**Disclaimer: I own tissues and ice packs. But not this.**

**And I feel horrid but I wanted to get another chapter out, so if it isn't up to par it's because I'm not my usual perky self. Enjoy.**

_The wolf was directly in front of me, and I knew I had to control myself to not jump on him and rip out his throat. He changed back into a human, and a very naked Sam walked up towards me._

"_I wont kill you because you didn't choose this life." This was the first Quileute I had seen in four years. I had some handle on my control, though it was still a bit hard for me._

"_Sam, no offense, but you need to move away. You smell bad, and your…uh… your blood…" of course he knew what I meant._

"_I will just give you the same rules as the Cullens. You are not allowed to step onto Quileute land, especially not to hunt. And as soon as you bite or kill someone, we will come after you." His voice was hard. I felt the twinge of pain come from my unbeating heart when he said that word._

"_Sounds fair." He turned to go. "Sam, how is Jacob?"_

_He turned back to me then. "Understandably, he hasn't been taking this well. And I should tell you, Charlie isn't either." My father! "He's really sick, Bella. I'm sorry."_

Tensions at the Cullen house were high for the next few days. Tanya hadn't done anything major, and Alice kept telling me she couldn't see her planning anything, so I was ok for the most part. But the boys all knew something was up by now, although they didn't know what. I had actually walked in on Jasper trying to persuade Alice to tell him. And Edward was getting annoyed by the songs Alice was singing in her head. He didn't even bother trying to look in Rosalie's head anymore since he wanted to avoid being mentally scarred.

I sure as hell wasn't going to tell him anything. I didn't want to be the one to tell a Cullen that one of their close friends was being a vindictive bitch. So I kept my mouth, and my mind shut. Not that I had much choice with my mind.

We, meaning the girls, were sitting around the living room one day while Edward, Jasper and Carmen hunted. Carlisle was at work, and Esme and Eleazar were in the greenhouse. Emmett was probably kissing his muscles in his room or working on a wrestling technique.

A knock at the door surprised everyone, including Alice. "I think my visions are seriously going haywire." She muttered as she went to go get the door. "Kate! Irina! We weren't expecting you!" she said, hugging the two women in front of her. Tanya smiled and stood up.

"I think I'll go tell Esme they've arrived." She announced, walking hastily from the room. Rosalie came and hugged Kate and Irina as well, while I surveyed them. Irina was shorter than Kate, but still a few inches taller than Alice. Kate had enormous owl eyes, and shoulder length brown hair that hung stick straight. Irina also had dark hair, and her eyes were black with circles under them.

Tanya arrived with Eleazar and Esme in tow. They all said their hellos and settled in to the various seats in the living room. Esme told us that Carlisle would be home from work shortly and that it shouldn't be long before the boys and Carmen were back.

"Irina, Kate, I don't believe you have been introduced to Bella, the vampire from Forks." Tanya said, off handedly. The small girls eyes shot towards me, and I could hear the growl build up in her chest.

"Oh dear." Esme said, standing up and walking towards me. Her words reflected my thoughts. Oh crap. I was the girl that the wolves killed Laurent to protect. Oh crap oh crap. I was going to have to defend myself, and I was going to get into a brawl with their friends. Oh crap.

I could see Irina get up and walk towards me. I knew somewhere in my mind that she had run, but I was for some reason playing it in slow motion. She was inches away from my face and her hiss filled my ears; I was panicking, and I clutched Esme's arm. I could hear her talking to Irina, but I couldn't make out the words and I was sure the small girl couldn't either. I thought about not fighting her, trying to avoid a conflict between the Cullens. This led me to imagining the things she would do to me. Which caused me to panic even more. I started to breathe heavily, even though breathing at all was unnecessary. Closing my eyes, I tried to think happy thoughts, when all of a sudden everything went black.

I came back into focus mere moments later, but Tanya and Irina were not near me anymore. Esme was leaning against the wall, and Irina was sprawled out on the floor. 'What happened?"

Esme looked at me with concern in her eyes. "I don't know."

"Bella, what did you do?" Rosalie asked me, as she went to her adoptive mother.

"I have no idea. I just didn't want them near me anymore, and I was trying to think of something happy, and then I blanked for a minute." Carmen and Eleazar had picked up Irina and she was sitting between them on the couch. All three of them looked at me like I was a psychopath, but Tanya's face was the worst. She looked as if she had swallowed an entire lemon. "Esme, are you ok?" I couldn't worry about the stranger when a friend might be hurt.

"I think so." She said, looking at me. "Yes, I remember now. I was holding your arm, and trying not to let Irina hurt you. And you looked terrified…" she trailed off, rubbing her temple. Could she really not remember?

"Perhaps I should call Carlisle."

**I have been placed (ha! More like ordered) on vocal rest, and as such will probably be spending either A LOT of time writing this, or none. It all depends on whether these antibiotics make me tired or not. Anyways… 5 reviews, and you'll get a new chapter. You must have ****something**** to say, you can't all be robots that don't have the reply button programmed into their system or something.**

**Peace!**


	23. My Junk

**Disclaimer: I now own this throat spray, and it's telling me to spray 3 little squirts in to the back of my mouth, so I sprayed 6… is that a bad idea? But hey, I don't this ******

**I got an amazing amount of reviews for the last chapter… which makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. Keep it up guys!**

Esme went to the phone and quickly called the office. I sat in my chair and tried to understand what was happening. Esme couldn't remember the last few minutes worth of memories, and I was sure Irina couldn't either. I didn't pay any attention to Esme on the phone, but I did notice when Emmett tried to make an appearance.

"Whoa, who died in this place?" he snorted. I guess we looked a little somber.

"Emmett, shut up." His wife growled from across the room. He immediately wiped the smirk off of his face and walked up to her. Taking Rosalie in his arms, he leaned down and began whispering things into her ear.

I felt a hand on my shoulder. "Carlisle should be home soon. He has one more patient. Are you feeling all right?"

Now that she mentioned it, my throat was burning. "I think I may need to hunt son, but I'm fine otherwise." I said. Patting her hand and giving her a weak smile, I hoped Carlisle would have some simple answer for us.

We didn't have to wait long. Carlisle rushed through the door and ran up to his wife. Hugging her softly, he then turned to Kate and Irina, and welcomed them to his home. "Esme, can you tell me what happened?"

"Irina was upset with Bella, so I went up to her to comfort her. And I was asking Irina to stop because Bella was getting this panicked look on her face, and all of a sudden I just couldn't remember what I was doing there, but I knew that there had to have been a reason. I just couldn't remember what that reason was. I remember now though, so whatever happened was only temporary." Esme looked at her husband, trying to sooth his frazzled nerves.

"Irina?"

"I couldn't remember either." She spoke softly while shooting a look of contempt at me.

"Carlisle, I have no idea what happened. All I know is that I wanted to get everyone away from me but I didn't know how to without hurting the feelings of your family or your friends." I pleaded with him.

"Bella, calm down. I know you didn't do anything on purpose, all right? Just stay calm while I take Esme and Irina to my office to talk for a few minutes. Just stay here with the kids." He smiled at me reassuringly, and took his wife and Irina upstairs with him.

"So, what exactly did I miss?" Emmett asked. Rosalie rolled her eyes, and Alice got up and walked out the back door.

"Tanya mentioned to Irina that Bella is the girl the werewolves killed Laurent for." Rose murmured. Emmett shot a look of shock at Tanya, who didn't flinch. She simply started filing her perfect nails. Rosalie led Emmett to chair where she sat on his lap and started whispering in his ear, too low for me to understand. What I did hear was the sound of the door breaking, as Edward came in, followed by Jasper, Alice and Carmen.

In one deft movement he had me in his arms and was hugging me fiercely, much more than he ever could when I was human. "Are you all right?" he said. He let me go reluctantly and put his hands on either side of my face, checking me over for any sores.

Damn him and his dazzling. "Uh, yeah, I think so…" I mumbled. Very suave, Bella. I could see him glance behind me quickly and knew he was trying to catch a glimpse of Tanya. And then something unexpected happened.

Sweeping me back into his arms, Edward Cullen leaned down and placed his lips on mine. My breath caught in my lungs as they pressed softly, then increasingly harder against my own. One hand was at my waist and the other tangled itself in my hair. And the funny part was that even though I had asked for time and space, this was much more enjoyable. So I kissed him back.

Pulling away from me, he smirked at Tanya, who had a look of pure shock on her face. Standing up, she grabbed Carmen's hand and stalked out of the room. "Alice, does she have any plans?" Edward asked his sister without looking away from me.

"Only one," she replied. "To go back to Denali."

Thank god.

**My sock monkey and I are going to settle in for a nap since I have err… excused myself from classes today. Review please, and ye shall receive. Lol.**

**Peace!**


	24. Office Hours

**Disclaimer: I own a screwed up laptop that has deleted this chapter twice now. So screw it already. Arg. But I don't own this. Thank you.**

"Ew, guys! If I wanted to watch two people getting it on, I would go upstairs with Rose and we could-" Emmett's whining was drowned out by Edwards growl. I just giggled and went to sit on the now vacant love seat.

"Emmett, enough! I don't need to hear it or get mental images of it!" Edward started rubbing his temples as he walked to sit next to me. "Besides, I'm trying to concentrate on what is happening upstairs, so if you could tone it down…"

He took my hand and started rubbing little circles on it. We waited in silence until we saw Tanya storm out of the house, followed closely by Carmen and Kate. When Irina came down the stairs and glared at me, Edward shot up and crouched, ready to pounce. I just put a hand on his shoulder and walked up to her.

"Irina, I know nothing I say will change how you feel for me, but I want you to know that I'm sorry for your loss." Even if he did try to eat me.

"And if you ever think of hurting her again, you will destroy the friendship of our two clans by answering to me." Edward growled. I shot a look back at him and his look softened, although only slightly. When I turned back to Irina, she was gone, so I just went to take my seat.

"Carlisle, Esme, I am most sorry that our visit was cut short. You know Tanya, very passionate… but I do hope to see you all soon." Eleazar was saying his goodbyes to the heads of the house. I couldn't help but feel a bit guilty about driving their friends from their home, but I was more relieved that I wouldn't have to deal with Tanya anymore.

"This means your staying?" Alice asked. I looked at Edward, unsure. Yes, we had just shared a tender moment in front of his family, but did that mean I forgave him, forgave his family for what they did?

"At least for a bit longer than expected. I have no idea if this is a permanent solution though." I said with finality. I was in no mood to have an argument with her, especially not when I was still waiting for Carlisle to call me up to his office. Which he did.

"Bella…"

I sighed. "Yes Carlisle, we can go up to talk in your office." I stood up to start walking, and Edward stood with me. "Edward, I'm pretty sure this is a private conversation."

"I want to be there, and besides, I will hear most of it in Carlisle's thoughts anyways, so there is no reason for me not to be with you." Damn boy and his mind reading abilities.

Grudgingly I let him take me hand and led him upstairs. It wasn't that I didn't want him in there with Carlisle and me; it was more that I was afraid of what we would find.

"So," Carlisle said after we sat down and made ourselves comfortable. "Can you tell me what happened in the living room before Esme and Irina went blank?" Edward quietly held my hand.

I recounted my story. "And then all I wanted to do was get everyone away from me, and I blacked out. I came back into focus in a few seconds, but Esme and Irina weren't anywhere near me." Carlisle looked pensive the whole while that I was speaking, obviously in deep thought.

"You told me that you could remember little to none of your existence as a vampire?" he said, looking at me as if his son wasn't even in the room.

"Yes."

Edward nodded his head then, and I knew he was reading Carlisle's mind. "Yes, Carlisle, that might explain it."

"There is a person in here who isn't a mind reader, so do you want to fill her in?" As a human it had always bothered me when Edward held conversations about me in his head.

He simply leaned down and kissed my forehead. "Carlisle was wondering if the two are intertwined. If perhaps your inability to remember your past can sometimes expel itself from your body and envelop people trying to harm you."

This made sense. "Do you think that's the reason Esme and Irina forgot?"

"I'm almost certain. Obviously they didn't have a very strong reaction, because they both began to come to their senses only minutes after the incident. But if you had been in real trouble, you would have had enough time to get away." He pursed his lips. I heard Edward's growl begin, low in his chest, and Carlisle looked at him in an admonishing way. "Edward do you think I would ever do such a thing?"

I cleared my throat, waiting. "I was just wishing that there was some other way to gauge this without putting you in danger." He said. "Edward heard me thinking and probably thought I meant to stick you in some dangerous situation, didn't you, son?"

"Perhaps." Came his short reply.

"Serves you right for peering into my mind." He said. But there was caring in his voice, no enmity. "Now, Edward, could you please leave Bella and I for a moment? There is something I would like to discuss with her in private." Of course the bronze haired angel wasn't having any of this. So, sighing, I took his hand and pulled him off the chair, pushing him out the door and shutting it. Carlisle watched all of this with an amused expression. "Bella, have you thought any more about staying with us? Permanently?"

"Some, but I have other things on my mind as well." I said honestly.

"And?"

"Well, seeing as how the administration at Forks High believes I have moved away, there is a bigger chance that I may stay. But still, there is nothing definite." I warned him. I didn't want him telling Esme and getting her hopes up while there was still a chance I might leave.

"I wont tell her anything until you give me the okay." He smiled, somehow knowing exactly why I was giving him the warning. I smiled too, and he showed me to the door, walking with me down the stairs to the living room.

And all the while, sweet music from the piano floated on the air.

**So I am extremely sorry! I know I'm lagging, I've just been resting and I just had to take a little break. Hopefully I'll bring it back up to it's normal pace tomorrow.**

**Review! You can't have forgot my rule! :P**

**Peace!**

**Oh and a special shout out im.dazzled. (for being an amazing reviewer :) and to molly cullen for thinking my writing is good enough to get me published someday! And over 5000 hits! AHHHH**


	25. Lesbian Lies

**Disclaimer: I own a copy of the original Broadway cast recording of Rent, and lemme tell ya, I am beyond sad that's it's closing on Broadway before I get a chance to see it ********. But, I don't own this. Still.**

All was well in Galena. If you could consider having Alice pestering me constantly to stay here forever "well". Or if you could consider Emmett trying to make me freak out and give him temporary amnesia "well". Or if you could consider having Edward stare at me with puppy dog eyes at all moments "well". By this point, I had pretty much decided that I would stay, but since Alice couldn't see my decisions, I played with her a bit. And Edward too, because of course he could never read my mind. A little torture to get back at him was appropriate. That is, until he decided that it needed to be discussed.

"You are being incredibly cruel to me" he whined one day. I simply smiled at him and patted his hand. Rosalie snickered and Alice looked like she agreed wit Edward. Of course Emmett and Jasper were too interested in their video game to pay any attention.

"Guys, I don't know. But I promise, as soon as I figure out whether I'm staying or not, you will be the first to know." Rolling my eyes, I settled back to watch the boys play. Edward stared at me while Alice and Rosalie looked on one of the laptops for clothes to have shipped over. "Besides, maybe I have some long lost love waiting for my return in Forks." I added off-handedly. I was joking, but Edward fell for it hook, line and sinker.

"What? Who is this man? Where did you meet him? What does he have that-"

"Who said it was a man?" Even Emmett stared at me for that comment.

"Whoa Bella, please tell me you and some chick aren't like, you know…" he said, astonished. Edward groaned and started rubbing his temples, and I knew that Emmett was imagining a dirty sequence playing out between me and other females. Jasper however, snickered. I had no doubt in my mind that he could feel my impishness.

"Jesus, guys, she's just kidding. Emmett, stop drooling, and Edward, stop worrying about not being good enough. Seriously." He turned back to his video game. Emmett, his opponent, was too busy thinking of other things to even concentrate, and Jasper soon beat him.

"You are the most wicked creature I have ever come across" Edward said, taking my hand.

"Yes, and I am the wicked creature that wont let you follow her into her bedroom tonight." I replied. Ever since we had shared that very public kiss, he had come into my room as I rested. I knew I would never fall asleep, but he would sit in an armchair and watch me lay there with my eyes closed. We had not done anything in the way of physical affection since that day, probably because he thought I still wanted space.

I did, but I also longed for him.

"Rose, how about I get it in purple, you in blue? I should call quickly since they're closing soon, I never accounted for the hour change." Alice said as she took out her cell phone to call the store. The moment she put it into her hand, however, it rang. "Damn." Alice answered the phone. "You need to call her back, I have an urgent matter… listen to me, pup, I don't care about your little troubles, I need to use my phone so you will just have to… oh try and find me, I dare you…" she snarled into the phone. Judging by her hatred of the person on the other end, I knew it was the werewolf. Sighing, I stood up and retrieved the phone.

"Yes, Jacob?"

He sounded frantic, and I could imagine him pacing in his small kitchen while talking to me. "Bella something happened."

"What do you mean?" the tone in Jake's voice was one that meant I would not like the next words.

"Someone, or something, I don't know, came looking for you. Seth got hurt and-"

"Seth!? How is he? Please tell me he's all right!" who would hurt Seth, and why were they looking for me? I glanced up at the Cullens, who were all staring. "Hold on." Making my way swiftly out the front door, I knew it wouldn't help my privacy, but it was the principle of the thing. "Talk. Tell me everything."

"Embry smelled the vampire first. Well, we think it was a vampire. Anyways, we were following the trail when Seth's face met this tree. We didn't know what was going on or why Seth was singled out, but the next thing we knew, he stopped being attacked. He was just lying on the ground and whimpering. Don't worry Bella, he's fine now, but he kept telling us that he heard someone asking where you were. He said he could hear them asking him clearly and didn't believe us when we said we heard nothing."

"Shit, Jake." I sat down on the porch swing. How was I supposed to reply?

"Didn't you tell me once that some vampires have special powers and stuff? We think that this vampire might have a power that makes him invisible or something. I had to call you just in case, I don't want anyone to find you and hurt you." He said quietly.

"Jake, really, I appreciate the concern, but don't let yourselves be hurt by trying to protect me. I'm not that shy little human anymore, remember? Body of stone…" I tried joking, but nothing was going to brighten the mood. "So what do we do now?"

"Well, you sure as hell can't come back here, Bells, it's way too dangerous."

"So then what?"

He was quiet for a moment, and I knew he was either thinking hard or trying to something he didn't want to. Or possibly both. "Bella, I think you're going to have to stay wherever it is you are. If you're still with the Cullens, they will help protect you, wont they?"

"I'm sure of it."

"Then I don't think I'll be seeing you around Forks for a while. Please, stay safe."

"I promise. Bye, Jake."

"Bye, Bella." I hung up the phone. Leaning my head back on the seat, I worried about telling the Cullen family that not only was I going to intrude on their hospitality indefinitely, I was also going to need protection.

"Well, it's official," I said as I walked back into the living room. Esme and Carlisle had joined their children, for which I was grateful; better to knock them all out at once. "I'm here to stay."

Alice squealed in delight and jumped up to hug me, while Jasper handed Emmett some bills. I patted Alice's head and sighed. "Don't get all happy yet. According to Jacob, some stranger came to Forks looking for me."

**So… what do you think is going to happen? ;)**

**Review. And a special shout out to dazzledmom just for making my day :**


	26. Dreams of Sleep

**Disclaimer: I own a broken heart. Don't even ask. And to my fucking pleasure I don't own this.**

**Edward left Bella, again, and she was killed by whatever creepy vampire it was that hurt Seth. The end. Ok, so maybe that was a sick joke.**

All of us sat in the living room and just thought. The silence was creepy. "Carlisle, are you sure that you don't know of any vampires with that sort of power?" I said, hoping that he would answer me differently this time.

"Bella, I keep thinking, but I have never heard of anyone with a power even close to that." he replied, for the third time. Edward had been quiet this entire time, not saying anything. He had just pulled me to his lap and held me tightly. "Edward?"

He looked up at me. "Hm?"

"Did you think of anything?"

He looked extremely displeased. "No, I haven't thought of anyone like that." His grip on me became more defined and he rested his head on my shoulder. This was nice, even if we had more pressing matters at hand and I didn't even know what Edward and I were anymore.

"So what are we going to do?" came Rosalie's quiet question. She had been deep in thought until this point.

"We're going to find this creep and kick his ass!" said Emmett, flexing his muscles.

"Emmett, shut up." snorted Jasper. "Look, how do we even know this vampire is bad? Yea, so he attacked a werewolf. A lot of vampires would do the same exact thing. They _are_ our enemies, after all. It could have just been instinct." He remained calm with Alice beside him.

"I just wish I could remember if I knew him." I snarled. I was getting frustrated, and that feeling was snowballing with every new event that took place. Edward started rubbing little circles on my back, and I leaned into him. My eyes were closed, as if I was hoping to see something that might help behind them.

"_Isabella, my dear, I would never take your life away. You may have a gift far more important than you believe." Came Aro's soft and humorous voice. My request had been denied. Damn them all! "Of course, if you feel you have no meaning for life, perhaps you should join us? Give us a chance to show you the different way one of us can live." Of course he was shocked by my golden eyes. Most of them were._

"_No thank you." I said. "I can see you will be of no help, perhaps I can find someone else to sympathize with me."_

"Bella!" said Edward. I shook my head quickly, bringing myself back to the present.

"Sorry, I was just remembering something." I said, taking his hand and squeezing it gently.

Carlisle sat up in his seat. "Did you see something useful?"

I shook my head. "Nothing I can think of. I just saw myself back in Volterra, but no creepy invisible vampires." I said, smiling weakly.

"I think I am going to go into my office and think all of this over." Carlisle stood up, taking Esme's hand. "Come with me, my sweet?" they both exited up the stairs together. Rosalie and Emmett were talking in hushed whispers, and I didn't even try to listen in. I was tired. So I left Edward's arms and stood to walk up to my room. He looked at me and I knew what he was thinking. "No, Edward, I wasn't being serious when I said you couldn't come into my room tonight." I sighed.

He smiled the crooked smile that made me weak in the knees. "Race you." And of course he won. I went to change my clothes and lay on my bed. I had to hand it to Alice; she had been prudent by ordering me clothes. At least now I had something to wear. Edward waited for me on the armchair in the corner. We were quiet, although I knew he was watching my every breath from his seat.

"Bella?" He murmured.

"Yea?" I said. I kept my eyes closed, wishing that I could actually sleep, and he could take me in his arms and hold me.

"Why do you think you have the power you do?" well, this certainly wasn't the question I was expecting. I opened my eyes and sat up.

"What do you mean?"

"Carlisle thinks that we carry our strongest traits with us into this life. Why do you think that you have this power of forgetfulness?" he said, not looking at me.

I thought about it, and knew he wouldn't like the answer I gave him. "I think it's because during the last few months of my life, I tried everything I could to forget you. You told me I would, but in truth I remembered all of you so vividly it hurt me at night, so I wanted nothing more than to forget." All of this I said in a whisper, hoping that would take some of the hurt away from both of us.

"Why did you go to Volterra?" what was this, an interrogation?

"To die." If he could do it, why couldn't I?

He jumped up and shot over to my bed. Still maintaining some sort of distance, he sat down and looked at me bug eyed. "Why in heavens name would you do that?" he asked, trying to keep calm.

"Why did you?"

Edward fell quiet at that. "Touché."

"I knew I was never going to move on, Edward, and I couldn't stand being alone anymore." I took his hand and rubbed it gently. He looked at me hopefully.

"So there was never anyone else?"

"Of course not. I would ask the same for you, but I already witnessed you and Tanya, so…" I shrugged. I didn't want to let him see how that one short moment still hurt me.

He pulled me across the bed and held me tightly to his chest. "Tanya was a girl with some sort of fascination with me, and affections I shot down as politely as I could as often as I could. You will always be the only woman for me, Bella Swan." He kissed my hair. "I will do anything to make you believe that."

"I do."

**Love sucks!**

**Review! Please.**


	27. Pixie Plans

**Disclaimer: I own a mattress that probably has my profile imprinted in it since I refuse to get out of bed. But alas, I do not own this. Boo fucking hoo. **

I opened my eyes and saw the sun. Apparently I had been in Edward's arms throughout the entire night. He gave a low chuckle. "Good morning sleepy."

"Edward don't be ridiculous, I am not sleepy. Besides, vampires can't sleep. So that nickname is completely preposterous." I had pulled away from him and was leaning on the bed frame. "It would be nice though." I added wistfully.

"I can agree with that one hundred percent." He smiled, looking up at my face. His smile withered a bit when he reached out and touched the skin under my eyes. "You need to hunt, love." If I had had a heart, it would have fluttered when he called me that.

Tentatively, he moved his and from under my eyes and to my cheek, caressing my face. I leaned into him, ready and willing to kiss Edward, but Emmett burst in, ruining the moment. "Oh, shit! Sorry guys! I'll come back." He tried to close the door, but Rosalie just pushed him aside.

"You two come downstairs. Emmett had an idea." I was apparently looking at the two of them incredulously. "Bella…" she said warningly. I jumped out of bed and followed the three of them to the living room. Edward pulled me back onto his lap and I made myself comfortable. Lord only knows what Emmett had planned.

"Emmett, if you are going to speak, do it now." Carlisle said after his largest son had fidgeted for a while.

"Well, we know that some creep is out looking for Bella, right? But he still doesn't know where she is, which is here. So what if one of us, not her, went down to Forks, and led him up here? I mean, there are eight of us if you include Bells here, or still seven if Eddie here doesn't want her fighting. We could take him… or her, whatever the hell this thing is. The mutt said that only one of the werewolves was hurt, which means that he or she probably can't control more than one person at a time. And look at it this way. If he holds some key to Bella's past or something, who knows? We don't actually have to kill him until we know he's dangerous." He shrugged. "Anyways, that's my plan. Didn't know if you would go for it or…" he trailed off, looking at our shocked faces.

"What, you think I married him for his bulging biceps?" Rosalie asked. "He can do something other than flex or kick ass."

"Emmett," Carlisle said. "I think that is the most intelligent plan I have ever heard. I have always said that if you put as much effort into thinking about something important as you do planning pranks, you could do a lot for this family." He stood up and patted his son on the back. "I like it. I think it's good, and I think we should do this soon, before they leave Forks or their scent disappears."

I spoke up for the first time. "Who will you send?" I didn't want anyone hurt because of me. I couldn't think of anyone I would send, and I didn't even notice the pixie like creature go into a trance.

"Me." Alice said. "You're right Carlisle, I am the best at weaseling myself out of tricky situations. I'll just go pack." She had obviously seen her father's choice in her head, and she stood up to go get a suitcase

"Carlisle, I want to go with her." Jasper said frantically. I knew he would be worried about his mate. But before Carlisle could even answer, Alice did.

"Jasper think about this with your head, not your heart. If we both go, one of us could slow down the other, or blow our cover, or a hundred things could go wrong. This is right, I know it." She kissed his hand, and leaned down to whisper something I couldn't help over hearing. "No matter what, I will return to you." She stood up straight and left the room.

"Well, now that we have that settled, what do you propose we do once they arrive?" Esme said, pacing the room.

All of us thought about this until I spoke up. "I don't want to just destroy him, unless he poses a threat. What if he has answers for me? Things I need to know?" Edward growled behind me and I rested against his chest. "If he is dangerous, I don't care about any answers, but if he doesn't give us an immediate reason for harming him, don't you think it would sensible to get whatever answers we can out of him?"

Jasper looked at me. "As soon as he makes a questionable move, we attack." The finality in his voice told me that this conversation was over.

**I can't access my email, and it is making me fidget.**

**5 reviews… sneak peeks if you do… yea whatever.**


	28. All I Need is my Guitar and my Girl

**Disclaimer: I own a six-pack of vitamin water (**_**my**_** brand of heroin haha) but I don't own this. Touché, Stephenie Meyer, for thinking of this before me.**

When Jasper came back from dropping Alice off at the small Galena airport, he didn't talk to anyone. We all felt waves of misery grip us, but he retired to his bedroom and they eventually pulled away. I felt bad for him, his mate being away from him. So I left Edward and walked up to his door, knocking softly.

"Come in, Bella."

"How did you know it was me?" I said, opening the door and surveying the scene. Jasper was lying on the bed, one arm draped over his eyes. The lights were shut off, but from the beam escaping from the open door, I could see that the room was nothing like I would imagine Alice would decorate a room. One wall was covered with shelves, containing books upon books, a globe that looked as if it was an antique, and various breakables. The walls were papered with a soft green color, and the teak wood furniture was dark but still warm. A round white rug was placed strategically in the middle, and there was a dark green couch in the corner, with a guitar next to it.

"Your emotions. Emmett would have been feeling euphoric, since he would only come in here to tease me. Rosalie would be feeling fed up, since she hates when anyone wallows. Edward wouldn't even approach me, Carlisle would be feeling resigned, and Esme would be feeling much more sympathetic than you." He sat up on his elbows and gave me a ghost of a smile. "If it had been anyone else, I probably wouldn't have let them in."

"Oh. Perceptive." Was all I said. I closed the door and motioned to the couch. He got up and sat on it, patting it a couple of times and inviting me to join him. We both sat on the couch for a while, until I had the courage to speak. "I'm sorry Alice had to leave you to go protect me. You guys wouldn't even be in this mess if it weren't for-"

"Once upon a time, when a lethal vampire was out to get you, you thought we were being foolish and you were ready to just hand yourself over to him. Do you remember what I told you?"

"You told me that I was worth it. But still Jasper, if I-"

"No, Bella, listen. Alice also told you that if anything happened to you, none of us would be able to look Edward in the eyes again. The same applies here too. He tried to kill himself once because he assumed you were dead. What do you think he would do if he knew for a fact that you were dead?" he reached out and patted my hand consolingly. "You two have something, Bella, so quit denying yourself of what you need."

"I'm not trying to, Jasper, I just don't know if I forgive him totally yet."

He gave a short quiet laugh. "Bella, stop thinking with your head and think with your heart! All I feel coming off of you when the two of you are together is safety and love. And let's not even get into Edward's emotions. There are times when it takes all I have to not just jump on Alice and have her right there." Oh god, if I could have blushed, I could have created a new shade of red. "And stop feeling embarrassed, two people who feel those things often do more than just kiss or hold each other." He was smiling widely now, and I was glad because I could make him a little happy while his wife was off getting into god knows how much trouble trying to protect me.

A snarl ripped into the air from downstairs. "Edward, shut up!" we both yelled at the same time. I giggled and motioned towards the guitar. "You play?"

He smiled and picked it up. "My most cherished thing, next to Alice of course. When I was human, I learned to play the banjo, and then I taught myself to play the guitar after I became a vampire. It helped me catch prey sometimes, all I had to do was play on a street corner and they would come up to me." His smile became a bit less pronounced. "But it's not like that anymore. I doubt I could attract a herd of deer by playing 'Oh Shenandoah'."

He started strumming the strings, humming with them. Jasper was amazing at playing the guitar; he and Edward could have started a band and gone platinum. "Well, I can say this about your music, Jasper. If I were a human, you would have definitely captured me." He stopped playing and stopped smiling. He just looked at me with a sad expression. Oops, I knew what he was thinking about.

"Bella, I have to tell you how sorry I am for that night. It ruined everything. If I had had some handle on my bloodlust, all of it was gone the moment your blood permeated the air. I became a monster, and I-"

Now it was my turn to interrupt. "Jasper. Shut up and listen to me. You cannot help what you are. And believe me, I know the feelings of uncontrollable bloodlust too. What matters now is that the two of us stick together, be there for each other in case the other ever… slips up. You got it?" I was really happy that the two of us could have this conversation, have this type of nearness. "I never blamed you, not even at the time. You are… my brother." The last part I said as softly as I could manage, trying to inject sincerity. Jasper smiled and reached across the couch to hug me.

We both separated from our friendly embrace when we heard a soft knock on the door. "Jasper, could I steal Bella from you?" came Edward's musical voice. Jasper pushed my shoulder and smiled.

"Go."

**So I am going to upload pictures of my dorm apartment onto the thing when I can, so if you want to see my living arrangements, you can ******** and review. I am really sorry to everyone who reviewed for the last chapter, but because I can't access my email, I can't reply to your reviews (hangs head in shame) please forgive me!**

**Peace!**


	29. Hunting Zebras

**Disclaimer: I own a tattooed wrist… actually, I have 2! My right wrist says forgive, and my left forget… I got them tattooed in light pink so that I could easily cover them with stage makeup for when I act, but they're there. AHHH I don't own this though.**

"Yes?" I asked Edward as I stepped outside, closing Jasper's door.

He looked at me nervously. "I was wondering if you would like to go hunting with me." He looked into my eyes at first, but turned away, seemingly embarrassed. Jasper opened the door.

"Yes, Edward, she would love to." Damn empath was almost as bad as his wife. Edward looked up at me hopefully. "Yes, Edward, that would be nice. I would love to." He turned on his crooked grin then, melting my bones. We both walked downstairs and into the forest at a human pace, neither of us speaking. When we had been walking for a good fifteen or twenty minutes, he reached out and grabbed my hand.

Finally. I squeezed it and we continued walking like this until we smelled our dinner. "Northeast, about thirty yards." I whispered, and he nodded, his eyes gaining a wicked glint as they blackened and he let his instincts take over.

I remembered Edward telling me once that he didn't want me to see him hunt because it would be too dangerous for me. Now that it had lost all hazardous consequences, though, I could watch him hunt freely. He was even more graceful than Alice, a true feline who never made the wrong move. He gripped onto the first deer and snapped her neck in a refined way one can master only after hunting like this for years. He jumped onto another deer and cut her throat gently, and neither of us noticed that by this time, the rest of the herd had run away. I could have caught them, but I was watching Edward crouch down to his trophies and press their necks against his mouth. There was something sensual about seeing a Greek god-like figure devouring the juices of a deer carcass.

He looked up at me after finishing the first deer. Noticing I hadn't hunted yet, he looked around to see that all the other deer were gone. "Bella, what happened?"

"_I couldn't see her." Said Aro, confused, to Jane. The little girl had run up to her master when his expression went from pompous to shocked. Of course he couldn't see me, I had thought as much, especially since Edward had never been able to. And it served him right to try and cover his actions with a simple handshake goodbye. "Bella, do you know why that is?"_

"_I'm sorry, sir, but I have no idea. None at all." I whispered. Closing my eyes and thinking of the look Edward gave me when he first discovered how strange my brain was, I turned on my heel and walked out._

_I had the idea that if I did something stupid, the Volturi would be forced to act and destroy me. So I decided to hunt. It was easier for me after 40 years, but still uncomfortable to be around too many humans. And I felt lucky that Volterra had a lot of little alleys, where I could easily lure prey and feast._

_Stalking around the courtyard, I found two people walking down a small side road. And so I followed them. The girl smelled more appetizing than the boy did, so I grabbed her, planning on taking him as soon as I was done. I smiled wickedly and bent down, when all of a sudden I felt a hand on my arm. The man placed himself between myself and the girl, and seemed to want to protect her._

_I had no choice but to let her go. They both ran from me, and I leaned against one of the cobblestone walls, sinking to the ground and crying. How had I been so weak? And to hunt in Volterra, of all places! I had been so stupid! So I left the walled city, a city filled with vampires and yet safe from attacks, and vowed to never go back._

"Bella?" Edward asked me again. He was standing now, hands on either side of my face, staring into my eyes. I smiled at him wryly and reached out to rub his shoulder.

"I'm fine, Edward. I should just hunt." I put my hands on his and gently pried them off of my face. Looking around and sniffing, I could barely smell an animal's scent. Edward took my hand and led me to the other deer he had killed, and had not yet drained.

"Drink." He sat down and watched me as my instincts wouldn't even protest and I jumped on my meal. When I was finished and was wiping my mouth he said thoughtfully, "you looked just like Alice when she has a vision for a moment there. One of the times I most wished to see what you were thinking." I thanked god that he couldn't.

"I didn't see something I'm very proud of" I admitted. "I'm glad you can't see it and think less of me." Moving to where he was and sitting down after I buried the body. He turned his body and caressed my face, moving his arm down my shoulder and slinking it around my waist. Edward pulled me towards him and onto his lap.

"I could never think less of you if I tried." He murmured while grazing my neck with his teeth. "You are on my mind every minute of every day. To me you are the angel, the savior, the redeemer." His mouth moved to my ear, and he playfully bit my earlobe before whispering "the seductress."

That was it. I jumped on him and hurriedly placed a kiss on his surprised mouth. Not unwillingly, he pressed me closer to him and brought the kiss deeper. While sucking on my bottom lip gently, he rubbed his hand on my back and used the other to hitch one of my legs around his waist. I responded by pushing him, and myself, down to the floor of the forest and leaving his mouth alone. I moved to his earlobe, down his neck, onto his shoulder. While I was busy kissing other parts of his body, he moved my wrist to his mouth and gently kissed his way up my arm.

We did nothing more than kiss, but when we came to our senses, it was twilight. We hurriedly stood up and straightened our clothes, and Edward told me that although he had business to attend to tomorrow, I would have to hunt again. The one deer only turned my eyes to a dark gold color, and he said he wouldn't be satisfied until they were butterscotch.

We walked the rest of the way in silence. When we could almost make out the shape of the house through the trees he mentioned my memory again. "What was it you were remembering?" seeing my reluctance to tell him, he added, "I promise love, I wont think any less of you."

I couldn't look at him. "After Aro denied my request to die, I thought that if I did something stupid in Volterra, thy would have to act. So I decided to hunt. And I found a girl and this man, and they were together, but I planned on having them both; but when I reached out and grabbed the girl, the man placed himself between us, and I realized they were a couple. So I couldn't do it." I started to sniffle.

He used his hand to turn my face, cupping my cheek gently. "Bella, it's ok. You didn't hurt anyone. I know deep down, no matter how much you wanted to, you wouldn't have. You care too much." He hugged me briefly before pulling away. "Now, Esme is wondering where we are. I suggest we go back in."

We walked back into the house, hand in hand, and passed the living room. Rosalie was reading a magazine and Emmett was playing a video game. I could hear Jasper's guitar floating down from upstairs.

Edward let got and walked into the kitchen, and Rosalie saw me and let out a laugh. Confused, Emmett turned towards me. "Jasper, get down here quick! I think Edward finally lost his virginity, in the forest!" I was shocked, how did he know Edward and I had done anything at all? I ran a hand nervously through my hair and pulled back some leaves and dirt. Oh. "God, Bella, it really is a jungle out there, were you the poor zebra Edward pounced on, or did you play the lioness?" Emmett teased.

Esme came into the living room, followed by Edward. She was carrying a rolled up newspaper and swatted her son with it. Jasper had come downstairs as well, and was chuckling good-naturedly at me. "No, Emmett, Edward is feeling just as sexually pent up as before. I think our bet is still on." Bet?

Edward growled and cast a murderous glance at Jasper and Emmett before running and scooping me up. He didn't stop until he had me in his room and had locked the door.

**So, holy of holies I think I got my email fixed (whoopee!) anyways, review, now I can send you sneak peeks again so it's all good in the hood. 5 review new chapter **


	30. Cold Cullen War

**Was that last chapter smutty at all? Because some private messages told me it was… I'm going to say stop being a prude, they just kissed, which I made clear…gosh! And this person, who shall remain nameless, also said that I used the lord's name in vain too often. Jesus! (just kidding…but do you find it offensive?) Anyways, on with the show.**

**Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer owns this, but I asked her lawyers to give it to me when she dies. Which will hopefully be after she comes to her senses that we cannot live with just four Bella books and need more, and continues the saga.**

The next few days were the happiest of my lives, new and old. I felt at peace, and as though the separation was nothing more than a little scribble in the book of my existence. Edward and I did almost everything together, even had quiet time. I would read a book and he would sit there watching me read. Jasper couldn't help but feel a little happier since our happiness was bouncing off the walls, and Carlisle apparently, according to Emmett, asked Edward what his intentions were with me, and then proceeded to give him "the talk". God I wished I could have been there for that. The only gray cloud in our skies at the Cullen household was Alice. She had not called, had not been heard from, and I even called Jacob and asked him to sniff around for her. After a week, we were all fed up.

"Carlisle, damnit, I don't care about any plans, I'm going to go get my wife!" Jasper yelled. We were all angry by this point, and it did not help that he was sending his emotions out to all of us. He and Carlisle were in his office, having a private conversation, until Jasper raised his voice and brought the privacy to a screeching halt. Every one of us heard them talking, and this sudden burst of mutiny brought Rosalie in from the garage and got Emmett to turn off his game system. Edward stopped playing the piano and turned around on the bench to listen better, and I put down my book, not caring where my page was. Esme stopped dusting and sat down on the loveseat.

"Jasper, I am worried about her too. But you have to understand, maybe she thinks it would give her away if she called you." Carlisle's voice was strained. We could hear muffled sobs and I suddenly felt like the world was ending.

"But she wouldn't do this. Not to me, Carlisle." I didn't want to hear any more. I wanted to be there for my brother so badly, but it was a private moment between the two men and I didn't want to interrupt it. Sighing, I walked outside and down to the little house that held the Cullen's cars. Opening the doors to one of the cars, a sleek champagne colored one, I sat down and turned on the radio. I couldn't find any stations I could stand, so I settled for perusing the cd's.

"It's like the cold war in there, isn't it?" Rosalie mumbled as she opened the passenger door. This was a surprise.

"I wouldn't exactly know, seeing as I wasn't alive during the cold war." Was all I said. We had never been close, even though she had been kind enough to defend me against Tanya.

"Well, let me tell you, you didn't miss much, Russia was mad at us, we were mad at them, everyone else was terrified that one of them would do something stupid. Like I said, this is Cold war Cullen style." She smiled wryly. Then looked down. "Would you be up to going downtown with me?"

Still confused. "Why not Emmett? Or Esme?" she could have easily asked one of them, why would she ask me, the girl she once felt such disdain for?

"I told you already, Bella, I would like to make amends, to start new. So?"

I sighed, what did I have to lose. "Sure why not? Which car are we going to take?"

"We can take this one. Do you want to drive or should I?" she looked happy that I had agreed to go, and a bit surprised. I honestly couldn't blame her, seeing as I was a bit surprised I even said yes. I told her that I would drive and we made our way to the little tiny town of Galena. Jasper hadn't been kidding when he told me it was small. There were barely six hundred people living there, and downtown consisted of one road of ma and pa stores and restaurants. We found parking and walked into one of the clothing stores.

'Didn't you say Edward like the color blue on you?" Rosalie asked while looking through racks. "Why don't we pick out some things for each other, instead of ourselves? Alice and I have done it a few times and it's usually pretty funny."

"Yea, Edward loves the color blue. Uh, Your favorite color is…"

"Green." I nodded and got to looking. I was a bit worried, because Rosalie had a very…revealing taste, and I wasn't sure I would like what she picked out for me. But after fifteen minutes or so I found that I enjoyed this. She wouldn't show me what she was picking out, and I found some great things for her. Finally she said we had looked enough and that it was time to trade. I went over to her and handed her my picks, while she tossed me a bundle of things. Walking in to the small dressing room, I tried on the first garment. A cobalt blue knee length sweater dress, I immediately fell in love with it.

"Rosalie?" I called to the stall next to me. I hear her muffled reply. "I love the dress, but Edward would have a hard time keeping it one piece, I'm sure." I giggled.

She poked her head over the divider. "That dress is cashmere, if he touches it, I'll rip his hands off." She growled, and then grinned. "I love this parka, though, Bella. Good choice." I smiled back and went back to my pile of clothes. In the end, all of the choices she made for me were stunning, but I chose the dress and a pair of wide legged jeans. I was thinking that there was a chance I could enjoy shopping if it was Rose, when I heard her phone ring from her stall. She picked it up.

"Alice! Christ, Jasper has been worried sick! Why didn't you call him?" she nearly screamed, ran out, grabbed out clothes, threw a wad of money at the checkout girl, and pulled me into the car. "Drive." She ordered me, while putting the phone on speaker.

"His phone is dead, and the house line is busy." We both remembered that in an act of desperation, Jasper had squeezed the phone so tightly it broke apart. That explained why she couldn't reach him.

"So where are you?" I asked nervously. "Did you find the-"

"No I didn't," she said hurriedly and in a quiet voice. "His trail was gone, thanks to the rain. But I did run into Jacob Black and his friends. He had the nerve to ask me for a favor after trying to hurt my husband. Of all the nerve-"

"What did he ask you?" I was frantic, and needed to know he was all right too. "Anything important?"

"He asked me if I could bring his little girlfriend to the house for protection." She huffed. "He was begging me, he seems to trust a household of vampires, which just goes against their instinct. Kept saying that you could keep her safe, Bella. I told him I would have to talk to Carlisle and Esme, but I think I'm just going to tell him no." by now we had arrived home and were walking towards the house. Rosalie burst through the door with her cell phone in hand and walked up the stairs. I assumed she would hand it to Jasper, but he followed her downstairs looking for information. Meanwhile, Carlisle stayed upstairs and spoke with his daughter.

"How did she sound? Was she ok? Did she find him?" Jasper whined, very out of character for him. Rosalie rolled her eyes and went over to her husband sitting down.

I answered for her. "She was fine, no, she didn't find him and she sounded pissed off. Serves you right breaking your phone and leaving her with no way to reach you." I scolded him. He smiled his thanks and I proceeded to walk upstairs to Edward's room, hoping to find him in there. And there I did. He was playing smooth jazz on the stereo system and had his eyes closed as though he was sleeping. I walked up to him slowly and placed a kiss on his lips, startling him into opening his eyes.

"Have fun shopping?" he asked, while picking me up and moving us both to the bed. We lay there, me in his arms just like old times.

"It was fine, until Rosalie nearly scared the girl at the cash register to death." I replied. He laughed and we just lay there in silence, enjoying each other's company.

After a few short minutes, he groaned. "You've got to be kidding me." He said.

"What?" he had obviously read someone's mind.

"It seems we will be having human company." Was all he said.

**:) so review guys, and I hope you liked the chapter. I'm totally getting in to this story :P and I've been taken off of voice rest, and I can talk and giggle again without my director casting murderous glances. Yippee!**

**And I needed to flesh out all of the characters, to answer peoples questions about why I did certain things. Readers need to see that Emmett is more than a sex obsessed body builder and that Alice is more than a shopping crazy girl. Make sense now? Ahhh.**


	31. Rules

**Disclaimer: my sock monkey and I are going on a trip to North Carolina as soon as my best friend agrees to come too. So, I now own two plane tickets (the monkey will have to be put in my carry on :P). But, I still don't own this.**

"Is this some kind of joke?" I shot up out of Edward's arms and he looked immediately sad that I had left them. Sighing, he sat up and swung his legs over the side of the bed.

"No, Bella, I don't think it is. And we had better go downstairs, since Carlisle wants to call a meeting." He said, taking my hand and tugging gently on it. I growled a little at the thought of leaving the comfort of the bedroom, but followed him down the stairs and into the living room. Jasper was elated that Alice was seemingly returning home to him, and Emmett looked highly amused. Rosalie, on the other hand, looked as she always must when a human entered their lives: disdainful.

"Well, I assume you heard my conversation with Alice. Jacob Black, a werewolf friend of Bella's, and the alpha of his pack, has begged us to take his lover in. her name is Madeline, and she is twenty-three. It seems that our little friend is harder to find then we anticipated; Alice could find no track of any vampire, yet the Wolves keep getting hurt by him. Alice herself is fine, though spooked. She told me that there is little she can do if she cannot smell, sense, or see him and wants to come home. She should be here in less than a week, with a fragile and frankly terrified human in tow." he sat down before continuing.

"It was not wise for Jacob to tell Madeline everything about the Quileute's legends. She seems petrified of being shoved into a home filled with "the cold ones', even though Jacob took care to mention that we did not feast off of humans."

"If she is so scared, why doesn't she just stay in Forks?" Rosalie hissed, looking livid. The term 'if looks could kill' came to mind.

"Jacob is worried sick about this, and has offered his help and the help of his pack in return. If it returns Alice to us, and helps Bella's safety, can you truly say no?" He answered coolly. She sat back in her seat and her lips became one grim line. Emmett found all of this funny though, and had spent the entire time since the meeting had been called trying to hide his mirth. I looked curiously at Edward and he whispered in my ear, low so no one else could hear "He's thinking of different pranks to pull on his new victim." Oh. Poor Madeline.

"Now, she will sleep, and therefore I think we may need to have you vacate the guest room, Bella." Carlisle said. I simply shrugged; ever since Edward and I had hunted that day, I basically lived in his room anyways. "All right, good. Esme, if you could change the sheets in there? On my way home from work today, I will stop at a supermarket and pick up food." The thought of a near five hundred year old vampire shopping for food was too much. Jasper let out a giggle, and his joy caused the rest of us to laugh, including Carlisle, who practically roared. "Enough laughing at my expense."

He went to go get his coat and briefcase, and we thought that our meeting was over. "Not so fast," Esme warned, standing up in front of us. "There will have to be some rules. One, you, Emmett and Rosalie, have to cut back on the… private time. Sure, she may not have our refined senses of hearing, but she will still most likely be unnerved by the sounds you two make. Edward, restrict the piano playing to daylight hours, please. And enough with blaring the music at all hours. Jasper, if you even feel the slightest need to attack, turn around and walk right outside, got it? Bella, don't interrogate her just because she is dating your best friend."

How did she know? "I'm a mother Bella, that's how I knew." Edward took one look at my face and burst into a laugh that he tried to cover up by coughing. I elbowed him in the chest, and wiped that smile right off of him. "Rosalie, dear, I know you are very opinionated, but please, try to keep the tensions in this house low and give the wolves a reason to trust us, all right?" Carlisle walked in, gave his wife a kiss on the cheek and a thumbs up, and left for work. Esme resumed dusting, and Emmett and Jasper played video games. As Edward and I made our way up the stairs, we saw Rose sulking in her room.

"It's you all over again, love." Edward whispered, his breath tickling my skin.

"Oh, so you're going to fall for this one too?" I teased him, and grabbed his hand, pulling him into what was now our room.

"Well, with you standing beside her, I doubt I will even be able to notice her existence." He growled as he pushed me on the bed and kissed my neck. This was bliss.

I was waiting for it all to come crashing down on me.

**Five reviews- new chapter. Sneak peeks. Blah.**


	32. Pasta and a Side of Thighs?

**Disclaimer: North Carolina is officially go! Woo hoo! I own a heart filled with joy, but not this… damn.**

Edward and I were a bit occupied when Alice and our guest arrived. He had his hand up my shirt and was slowly making his way to my bra, a boat in uncharted territories. We had both decided to take it slow, but it was beginning to look like Edward was regretting it.

"Jasper, Jesus, be happy I'm not a human or you would have smothered me by now!" we heard a squeal, and I shot out of the bed, running to Alice and Jasper's room, with Edward not far behind.

Little Alice looked happy to be home, and the interaction between her and Jasper was more than I had ever really seen. He had her on his lap and was kissing her all over. "No, nugget, I most certainly would not like you to be a human, because if you were, most of this would be impossible." Nugget? I laughed manically, bringing awareness to the two lovers of our presence. Jasper growled while my laughter grew louder, and Alice left his arms to hug Edward and peck me on the cheek.

"The girl is downstairs. I had to give her off to Esme so I could come see my husband." She told me. I nodded and walked downstairs, not wanting to run at full speed and scare her to death. I found Esme giving Madeline a tour, and stopped to take this new temporary addition to our home in.

The first thing I noticed was that she was not a Quileute. Her skin was very pale, like mine had been when I was human. Her hair was a very light brown, with natural red streaks through it. And her eyes! They were the brightest green that I imagined when I thought of Edward before his change. She walked slowly, intimidated yet warming up to the motherly ways of Esme.

"The kitchen has been stocked for you. I'm afraid that most of us have not used a stove for a long time, so you may need to fend for yourself there." Esme noted as they walked into the kitchen. I followed.

"Actually, Esme, I would like to give it a try. It has been a long time since I have cooked, yes, but I think it might be fun." I said, calmly and in what I hoped was a welcoming tone. Madeline turned to me and I saw so many emotions in her eyes before they slowed to show curiosity and shame. Esme nodded to me and reached out to take Madeline's hand. The poor girl nearly jumped out of her skin, I wasn't sure if it was over the cold or because Esme was a vampire. I just said my hellos, told her my name, and left the kitchen.

Walking upstairs, I saw Edward was still in Alice's room, and I told him I was going to use his cell phone. He nodded and followed me up. As the phone rang, he grazed his teeth on my neck before moving to kiss my wrists. "Yellow?" Seth.

"Seth, give the phone to Jake, would you?" I tried to stifle a laugh as something Edward did was ticklish; looking down, I saw him reach his tongue out and actually lick my wrist. It was weird, but oh god.

"I see how it is, Bella. Never wanting to talk to me." He replied. But he didn't sound hurt, more amused. I could imagine what he thought was making me laugh.

"Aw, it's not like that. How are you feeling?" I hit Edward on the head, hoping to get him off of me. It just made him more willing to humiliate me while on the phone with a werewolf. He bent down and lightly bit my thigh, and I basically melted.

"Bella? Were you listening?" fuck. He had been talking and I was too busy trying to take it slow with my boyfriend.

"Uh, no, actually, I wasn't, Seth. Sorry, I'm trying to… download this program…" god I was pathetic. Even after all these years I still couldn't lie. Edward needed to give me lessons.

"I said I was fine, but I have to tell you, when it happened, I was creeped out. Like some leech was actually inside my head!" he said, and then laughed. "Anyways, I can tell you're kind of tied up, do you still want me to get Jacob or no?"

"Yes please." I bent my leg and kicked Edward where the sun doesn't shine. His smug little smirk was wiped off of his face instantly and replaced with one of pain. "Serves you right for interrupting my phone conversations" I hissed, smiling all the while. He moved until he was holding me in his arms and playing with my hair. "Stay like that." I ordered him, craning my neck to kiss his jaw.

"Yo." What person over the age of fifteen said that anymore? So early twenty first century.

"Your girlfriend is giving me weird looks." I teased. "Tell me quick, what does she enjoy eating, so I can give it to her as a last meal."

"Not funny, Bella. She loves pasta with pesto sauce, and anything chicken. And if you hurt her, so help me god…" I didn't need to see him to know he was trying not to shake.

"Jake, jeez, calm down kiddo. I wouldn't dream of it. But, while we're on the topic… the Cullen's? What exactly is up with that?"

He spoke slowly. "As hard as this is for me to say, she needs protection. Right now, all of us are trying to find your little friend, and I can't risk leaving her alone. I can't let anything happen to her. And I know you would take care of her. So screw my natural instincts to rip you to shreds, if you can keep Maddy safe, then I'm going to send her to you, end of discussion. Please tell me you'll protect her, keep her out of harms way."

"Of course, Jacob. You have done so much for me, buying Charlie's house for me, for instance." Edward tensed slightly at this, and I made a note to talk to him about that later. "I'll watch over her as if she were my own."

He breathed a sigh of relief. "Thank you so much Bella."

We said our goodbyes and I turned in Edward's arms to face him. "What was with all the biting and licking and stuff? I was trying to have a serious conversation, darling." I threw the last word out as sarcastically as possible, which wasn't very considering who I was talking to.

"What can I say? You are irresistible." He purred. "Right now, I don't feel like taking anything slow. Let's go as slow as I drive." And he grabbed me.

"Tempting Edward, but no. Especially not with a human in the house." I kissed him and tried to take his mind off of the rest of my body. "What do you find strange about Charlie's house?"

He immediately looked uncomfortable, and I knew I had hit my mark. "Well, love, don't be upset. But, after your father passed, I bought his house, thinking that I myself would probably end up sulking in it at some point. But, after the entire family became so fed up with my antics and I tried to make an attempt at being better, I sold it to Black." Oh. So this explained the house. Got it. He suddenly became very still, and I knew he was hearing someone's thoughts. "I believe we had better make an appearance in the kitchen, love."

**So… officially 10,000 reviews! Well, over that amount now, but woohoo!**

**My heart is slowly healing, and all the hits and amazing reviews are definitely helping!!**

**You know the drill- no sooner than 5 more votes, guys :P**


	33. Pools of Venom

**Disclaimer: I own figment, my favorite character from Disney's imagination ride. But I don't own this.**

Emmett and Rosalie were in the kitchen with Madeline and Esme when Edward and I walked in. the poor human looked like a fish out of water, and Esme was looking at a box of pasta and studying the directions thoroughly. I dropped Edward's hand and took the box from her, grabbing a pot of water and sticking it on the stove.

"Madeline, I'm making pasta and chicken, is that all right with you?" I asked, as the phone in Carlisle's office rang and Esme walked out to answer it. "Do you mind if I call you Maddi, or would you prefer I call you be your full name?" I looked directly into her eyes, and she blushed.

"Whatever you would like." She mumbled, dropping her hair in front of her face. I turned and saw my lover smiling as if he was in on some joke the rest of us weren't; which, given his mind reading abilities, he probably was. I turned to the now boiling water and poured some of the dry pasta in there.

"You know, Rosy, I'm feeling a little hungry right now. Maybe I'll have some… brunette for dinner." Emmett said while smiling wide and licking his lips. Rosalie snickered and I walked over to her husband and slapped him.

"Out of here! Now!" I hissed, pushing him towards the door. He grumbled about me being a spoilsport, but still walked out. Madeline looked as though she were about to faint, and I walked towards her, knowing to keep my distance just in case. "I promised Jacob that I would keep you safe. And Emmett is a joker and a prankster, but he is also harmless. You have nothing to worry about." I looked at Edward and motioned for him to leave. He shot me a dubious look but did what I wanted.

Moving slowly, I pulled out a barstool from under the counter. "Sit with me, let's talk." I pointed to the other chair. She took it uncertainly. "So, is Jake this overprotective of you?"

Her smile was short and bitter. "I know he loves me, but this may be a bit too much."

I laughed and agreed. "When I was a human, Edward was always overprotective of me too. You just have to show him who's boss" I winked at her.

"But he left you." She stated. I flinched and listened to see if Edward would be coming down. When I was satisfied that he wasn't coming, I countered her statement. "Yes, he left me, but he thought he would be protecting me that way, and he had no idea that I would be changed if he didn't stick around. Just the same way that Jacob sent you here, Edward only wanted me to be safe." She blushed again and as the blood pooled in her cheeks, the venom pooled in the back of my mouth. I swallowed and went to stir the pasta. Taking a piece out and throwing it against the wall, I determined that it was done, so I started on the chicken.

"I can handle it, if you don't want to." Madeline said, standing and coming over to stand next to me. I handed her the ingredients and excused myself, running outside. After grabbing a fox and getting blood in my system, I felt strong enough to go back in. Sure, I had never had human blood. But I was still young, and blood could tempt me easily, as Madeline's blood did in the kitchen. Opting out of walking back in there, I entered the house through the living room door, running upstairs and throwing myself onto the bed. I hadn't even been paying attention and didn't notice that it had been occupied.

"Miss me that much, love?" Edward pulled me into his arms and kissed my forehead. I mumbled at him to shut up and squirmed a bit until I was completely comfortably. "I think that girl wants me to feel uncomfortable."

"Well, from what I have seen of Madeline's mind, she is the uncomfortable one. She is extremely jealous of you, and ashamed at her own looks now that she has actually seen the first person to steal her lover's heart." He spoke softly, clutching to me and pressing me to him. What was he saying? Jealous? Of Jake and me?

"Are you serious? Jake and I were never together, I love him like a brother!" I spoke a bit louder than he did, but then remembered how vampires have super sensitive hearing. "She is being irrational." I grumbled.

He laughed enthusiastically. "Maybe a bit, but still, can you blame her? Comparing herself to you, an absolutely delectable goddess." I pushed his shoulder teasingly but leaned up to kiss him. The smell of food drifted to us from downstairs and I could hear Jasper play the guitar softly as Alice hummed along.

And then, suddenly, I heard a scream.

**Ok my email was out again, so I finally marched up to my schools Internet facilities and demanded that they fix whatever problem it was that was going on with hotmail. And then I had rehearsal, so I just posted this chapter since I had gotten all the reviews I needed. But now that the internet minions fear my wrath, I am more than one hundred and ten percent sure that I will not have these problems anymore, so the review thing is still in place and I will definitely be able to send sneak peeks again.**

**Sorry!**

**Peace!**


	34. Wolves and A Bulge

**Disclaimer: so last chapter sucked, and also, this is a little lemony fresh. It's like water with a hint of lemon. And I don't own this.**

Edward was always faster than me, so he got to Alice's room before I did. But still, we all made it there, except for Esme, who I assumed was watching Madeline. Jasper was holding onto his mate and whispering in her ear. Her eyes had a blank look and all of us knew she was having a vision, although only Edward knew what said vision was. His face was disgusted and scared, and I walked up to him and held him, hoping whatever Alice saw could be avoided.

Emmett, always against being out of any loop, wanted to know. Alice had snapped out of her vision, but was shaking, and Edward was obviously thinking very deeply. "So, which one of you freaks is going to tell me the future?" Rosalie, the more serious of the two lovebirds, glared at him, and he fell quiet. "Please."

"I saw Madeline. Whoever was hurting the wolves is here. We did exactly as Emmett had planned, but we also dragged a human into the mix. The girl was being ripped apart, almost from the outside." Alice whispered. Rosalie snorted.

"So nothing bad is going to happen to us? Great, you worried me for nothing. Let this vampire take the girl, as long as all of us are safe." Edward shook his head. "It isn't that simple, Rose. If the girl dies, Jacob will come after us and bring the pack. Irina will be furious at having the wolves nearby, and it will turn into a battle. Carlisle will of course try to protect the wolves and work out some sort of peace. Someone will get hurt.

I shivered, and Edward pulled me to him. All six of us were sitting on the bed when Carlisle came in. "I just got home. What happened?" Alice and Edward explained Alice's visions, and their father's face became contorted with thoughtfulness. "This poses a serious dilemma. Obviously, we must keep the girl safe. We can't risk the wolves coming near here."

"But what about Bella?" Surprisingly, it was not Edward who voiced this question, but Emmett. His face had lost all signs of jest, and I realized that he did truly care for me, if only in a brotherly fashion.

"Bella will be protected." Edward's finality was solemn and I could hear the promise in his voice. I would be protected. Carlisle held his nose in the same way Edward often did, but then looked up at Edward, who nodded very briefly. Carlisle then stood up and left the room, leaving us kids here again.

"I don't like this." Jasper whispered, and we felt his fear. The man in my arms shot him a look and the fear was replaced with calm, no matter how fake it was.

"Carlisle wants us to not tell Madeline of any of this. Just let her keep thinking everything is fine." Edward murmured, and I knew that this is what Carlisle had told him through his thoughts.

"Push comes to shove, he can have her." Rosalie hissed, and her husband started rubbing her back. "I'd rather protect Bella." Thanks, I guess?

"I would rather protect her as well." Emmett agreed.

No! "Guys, you can't do that. It means a lot to me that I am important to you, but if I survive and Madeline doesn't, one of us will be hurt by the wolves. I'm not some little child anymore; I'm less vulnerable than she is. Please, I'll be fine, just don't abandon her to protect me." I couldn't have the wolves hurt by the Denali Clan, and I couldn't have the Cullen's hurt by the Wolves. "And Edward, stop growling, damnit."

"Madeline is starting to worry." Jasper whispered, and we all stood up. Walking downstairs, the boys, minus Edward, started playing a video game in the living room, while Rosalie, Alice, Edward and I walked into the sitting area. Edward pulled me onto his lap, and I happily obliged by stretching out and making myself comfortable. Alice, always the bubbly one, tried to lighten the situation.

"So, Rosalie, see any good movies lately? I giggled a bit at her obvious awkward conversation starter, but my giggle turned into a sigh of happiness as I felt Edward blow his cold breath onto the back of my neck. Squirming in his lap, I tried to turn to face him, when he suddenly went stiff.

"What's wrong?" I whispered, but then I noticed it too. I had been squirming in his lap, and therefore rubbing against his more sensitive areas. The bulge against my back was becoming more pronounced. "What do we do?"

He scooped me up awkwardly and ran the fastest I have ever seen him run up to his room. Throwing me on the bed, he pounced on me and had his lips on mine before I could even blink. Forcing my lips open with his tongue, he literally took my breath away by breathing in; I put my hands on his back and pulled him closer, deepening the kiss. The bulge I had felt before was becoming even more prominent than before, and he was purring as he lifted my shirt. Were we really going to do this?

"Edward, what about taking it slow?" I really wanted to, seeing as I had never experienced most of what coupling was about, and I couldn't just jump right in to it. He actually let out a whimper, but then an evil smirk replaced his pained look as he lifted me up and placed his hands behind my back. Removing my bra, he laid me back down gently, and the kiss deepened as I felt his hands on my breasts. "Edward." I warned him, knowing that if he kept doing this to me for much longer, I would have to give in. the pained look came back and he put his face between my breasts.

"I knew you were sent to this earth to torture me." He mumbled against my skin, and I felt a little sorry. So I took one of my hands and lifted his head so I could see his face.

"Edward, I want this to be special. And right now, there is a possible war looming in the distance, a human girl downstairs, and six vampires with sensitive ears in the building. I don't want to rush into anything with you, forcing it down. I want to savor it, take it slow. Please?" he kissed the area where his face had been moments before, beginning a trail up to my face. Taking his shirt off, he handed it to me and swung his legs over the side of the bed.

"I am ridiculous. I am a cad." He muttered, running his hands through his hair.

I crawled over to him and placed my arms gently around him. "No, Edward, you're not. I'm just being a prude." He smiled grimly at me and kissed my nose.

"If you'll excuse me, I'll be in the bathroom." He walked through the door, gently shutting it and locking it.

Now, that's got to be embarrassing.

**Would that constitute as a lemon? Seeing as I have no real idea…**

**Five reviews new chapter.**

**Peace!**


	35. Shattered Tables, Screeching Tires

**Disclaimer: My name mot certainly is not Stephenie Meyer. Shoot. **

The entire Cullen family was on their guard for the next few days. At least one of us was always with Madeline, and even though we all made our attempts at subtlety, I knew she could tell something was up. Carlisle even took off of work one day to just watch her. Edward never let me out of his sight, and it often got to the point where I had to push him out the door to take a shower in privacy.

Although there was a part of me that wanted to drag him in there with me…

It happened on a day where Edward was being pushed out of the house by Emmett and Carlisle, and forced to go hunt. "Edward, listen to them! Your eyes are pitch black, and with a human in the house, you need to go hunt before you do something stupid!" Alice had seen a vision of Edward hurting Madeline, and I had known it would take a lot to get him to hunt without me. I had hunted with him the day before, but he was so busy looking out for me he didn't actually eat anything.

He snarled at Emmett, who was inching closer to the door. "Yo man! Calm your shit! Or do you _want_ to eat the girl and have the wolves come and attack?" he hissed, pissed off that his brother was being so hesitant towards hunting. "She'll be fine here! With my brawn and Carlisle's brain, even if something does happen, we will be able to protect her!" he flexed to show his point. "Now go!"

Slightly relaxing his posture, Edward grabbed me and held me tightly before running out to the forest. I sighed, walking back inside and past Alice, who looked as if Bella Barbie should be taken out of the toy box. Walking to mine and Edward's room, I lay on the empty bed and tried once again to sleep.

"_I don't see why you do that to yourself, you know it will never work." Sneered a voice from the far side of the room. Looking up, I contorted my face to look menacing._

"_Shut up, Matthias!" I hissed. He chuckled darkly and walked up to the couch I was laying on. I hissed again and jumped off of it. He just shook his head, walking towards me. "What do you want from me?"_

Who the hell was Matthias? I sat up, smoothed my clothes down, and went to walk toward the door to speak with Carlisle when I heard it. A window or a door was breaking, and I nearly ripped the door off of its hinges trying to get downstairs. Esme was holding a terrified looking Madeline and running towards the garage, while Jasper looked around confused. Emmet walked swiftly over to me and clutched me, growling and turning around so he could survey every nook in the main room. I could hear Alice and Rosalie running outside with Carlisle, and the screech of tires told me that Esme was trying to get Madeline to safety. So it was myself, and five other vampires, against one. How hard could it be?

Considering the fact that we couldn't actually see said vampire, it turned out to be very hard. No windows had been broken, as I had previously thought, but the glass dining room table. When everyone (sans Emmett and myself) ran in there, the television set in the living room was reduced to rubble. I turned in Emmett's grasp, trying to get out, trying to see for myself what was happening, though I knew there would be nothing to see.

All of a sudden I felt as though I was soaring. Still in Emmett's arms, I saw that he had been shoved, and we both went flying across the main room and into the grandfather clock. My brother jumped up, snarling in my ear and running to where Rosalie was. Dropping me off to her, he ran back to the entrance and started looking wildly around. Rosalie looked wide eyes and serious. Her pose was protective as she put me against a wall and dropped into a defensive crouch before me. For god's sake, I was a vampire! They were treating me as though I were still a human being!

As if she could read my thoughts, she turned to me. "Bella, don't even think about moving." She muttered, bouncing slowly from one foot to the other. I nodded and swallowed. At least she was trying to help me. That is, until I saw her crumble as someone hit her head hard.

"Rose!" Emmett yelled, running into the kitchen, where we had been standing. She stood up shakily, looking around and growling. I stared at my surroundings too, hoping to see something. Nothing.

"Emmett, go look out in the back yard! They could have gone through the door!" Rose yelled, and he obliged, all too willing to destroy the person who hit his wife. As soon as he left however, we both realized what a mistake this all was. Rose was thrown into the wall, leaving a hole and dust. Someone I couldn't see grabbed me and pulled me outside, and I could feel a burning sensation from my wrists and ankles, as well as my neck. Carlisle ran towards me, but whoever was holding me punched him and picked me up, running faster.

I saw Edward race out of the woods. Looking at me in horror, being lifted by something none of us could see, I knew he was hearing this persons thoughts He roared and tried running after us, but I could see him getting farther and farther away.

He had me. Who he was or what he was going to do with me, I did not know. But I knew as I saw the pained look and my love's face that I would not enjoy it.

I could only pray that the Cullen's would find me and help.

**Dun dun duuuun (cue horror suspense music here, right?)**

**So I've decided that if I don't get this done by August 2****nd**** (which I, god willing, will) then a minor hiatus will have to be taken… breaking dawn will consume my life, and then a trip to North Carolina. So, cross your fingers I will finish this before then.**

**Five reviews and you get a new chapter! I did well with the sneak peeks this time!**

**Peace!**


	36. Tripping 'Cos of You

**Disclaimer: My ex boyfriend is sleeping in the next room and in a fit of absolute paranoia, I have not slept at all through the night. Agh what am I supposed to do? If I was Stephenie Meyer, would I be writing fan fiction?**

I kept my eyes open as my captor ran, hoping to be able to discern an escape path if it came to it. I may have become the first vampire to ever become dizzy, and I stopped staring at moving objects. This was extremely uncomfortable, and I was worried about the Cullens. I hoped they would help me. A part of me knew that they would try to find me, try to save me, but a small nagging part kept clawing at my heart and telling me that they wouldn't because they didn't care for me.

The shrill whistle of the wind around my ears became lower in pitch and silenced itself. Looking around, I saw trees. Great. Where was I? A place with trees. That was very distinguishing. The vampire that had brought me here showed himself. I gawked at him and he looked at me as though seeing an old friend. "Bella!"

A shaggy haired, red eyed, very tall vampire attempted to embrace me, but I shot out of the way. I didn't get very far, however, as he grabbed my ankle and caused my face to meet the ground. "Where are you going?"

"Back to my family." I mumbled, extracting the few bits of dirt out of my mouth. "I don't know who you are or what you want, but I seriously need you to leave me and my friends alone."

His look was, if possible, both shocked and disgusted at the same time. "You call them your family? Your friends? Don't you remember what they did to you? They left you to die! And you don't even remember me! How is that possible?" oh wonderful. Another person to sit here thinking I was a freak for having weird memory problems.

"Yes, yes, I know. How could I forget who you are? Stupid Bella." I grimaced. "So, since we have determined that I indeed don't remember who you are, how about quenching my curiosity?" I felt no need to be nice to this man. Sure, a rational part of my brain might have been telling me that I should be sucking up to this man, for he could hold the fate of my existence. But my rational self was being held underwater by my more irritated side.

He smiled at my dry humor. "So sad. Bella Swan, I am Matthias Bushneld. I saved you from death." Excuse me? What? This was news to me. Looking at my face, his shock grew more pronounced. "You really can't remember? Anything about me?" I started to shake my head, but then stopped myself.

"I remember me being in a room with you, I was laying on the couch and you were mocking me for trying to sleep. You looked like you wanted something from me, and it scared me." I mumbled. This was all I knew of him, my recollection of my vampire 'life' being what it was. He nodded.

"Yes, you were very amusing for the first few months." Months? I had been with him for months? "You truly never lost some of your human traits." Traits…became talents.

"Which human traits did you never lose?" I asked coolly. He smirked and looked over my shoulder at nothing in particular. "I was always sort of invisible when I was a human, always blended in. I was also adept at getting away when it came to theft; my family had been poor and I often stole food." That explained the invisibility and the fast running. "But let us talk somewhere else." He held out his hand, and ignoring it, I walked right past him and through the trees. Catching up, he began to lead, and we eventually found ourselves in some sort of fishing village. He walked to the nearest motel and paid for a room, and we entered it.

Sitting on the lone chair, I didn't invite any ideas with the bed. I saw the lust in his eyes, and would not give him what he wanted. I just prayed that my façade wasn't breaking; that he truly did believe I was tough and not cracking on the inside. "So, tell me about our time together."

He sat on the bed, as close to me as he could get. "I was the one who changed you. The wolves frightened me away and I did not return to Forks for months. When I finally did, your eyes had already turned an odd shade of ruby and gold mixed." His eyes twinkled. "You always confused me with your eating habits. I tried a few times to change your views, but you would not budge."

"I refuse to be so inhumane. To be a monster." I sneered, and his twinkle disappeared, replaced by slight disdain and disappointment.

"It is what we do to survive, Bella. It goes completely against our nature to deny our bodies of what they need." I opened my mouth to say more, but he waved his hand dismissively. "You stayed with me on and off until your father died, when you left for the funeral and never returned. I had heard of the wolves there and feared they had attacked you, so I went to see if you might have survived." Oh. So this was why he was attacking them, trying to find my whereabouts.

"What does it matter to you? What am I to you? What do you want from me?" I shot my questions at him like one would shoot a gun. If I could figure out what he wanted from me and give it to him, perhaps he would just let me go home. Matthias smiled sadly at me and leaned forward.

"You have always held my interest, from the first moment I lay eyes on your shaking human body." He murmured, reaching a hand out to try and touch my face. I growled at him and made to bite his hand, and he withdrew it. "Feisty. Why do you think I changed you? I needed a mate, and I made you to be one. But you spent all of our time together dry sobbing over these Cullens, and when I found that you had willingly gone back to them, it was unacceptable. You were turned to be with me, not with someone who left you to die." I could hear a low growl building up in his chest, and my face unwillingly showed, if only for a moment, my fear. Fear. He could use this to his advantage, as I was terrified of him. Standing up, walking slowly over to me and crouching so he could place his hands on my knees, my mind was racing with different ways to escape. "Why would you return to them? I watched you for years. Took you in every time you needed someone. Meanwhile, they act as though you never existed for seventy years. Seems you are not thinking straight." not thinking straight? Of course I wasn't thinking straight. I was in a cheap hotel room with a potentially dangerous vampire and no one to help me.

Matthias put his hands firmly on my face, pressing his lips against mine, and I froze. This was not Edward, and I did not like it. I tried to squirm out of his grip, but he moved his hands down to my waist, and I felt him pinching the skin there while attempting to force his tongue into my mouth. I screamed, and everything went black.

**Ok. So. San-Diego comic con. Who went? Can anyone send me footage of the twilight panel? I would be so damn thankful. And uhm. A lot of people who have posted reviews do not have their reply things enabled, which is why I haven't sent some of you sneak peeks. So when I get sent a review asking why I won't reply, I can't reply to answer their question. Sorry! **

**Also, be on the lookout, because I'm starting a new story soon :**

**The review rule is still in effect!**

**Peace!**


	37. Tearing At My Skin

**Disclaimer: ex-boyfriend now gone, sleeping soon. Thought I would crank this out though before I go. Have I mentioned that I don't own this?**

When I came to, realizing that I may have been the first vampire to ever pass out, I saw Matthias on the floor. His eyes were closed and I seized my one opportunity, bursting out of the door and into public. I headed straight for the woods, running as fast as I could with humans watching.

I had no idea what town I was in, what direction Galena was in, or how long it would take for Matthias to wake up. I couldn't stand the thought of him putting his hands on me again, trying to have his way with me. The places he had touched felt like they were on fire, I couldn't stand it. I needed Edward.

I could tell that he was there, running near me. But I didn't bother looking around. Damn vampire was probably using his talents to make sure he caught me unawares. And then I saw it. A shadow of russet fur, and a blur. And then a very naked Jacob Black came running. "Bella! Bella!" No! He was going to get hurt, I knew Matthias must be near. I tried to tell him through my expression to stay away, but it just made him run faster. "Bella, tell me you're okay!"

Before I even had a chance to answer, the right side of face crumbled and he went flying in to a tree. I could see the area where Matthias was punching or kicking him, and I ran up to where they were. Pushed back, there was nothing I could do if I could not see the person attacking my friend.

Jacob was not holding up well at all. At first he tried to growl, tried to fight back, but it was no use. He eventually resorted to whimpers and terrified looks at me, and I could feel the tears in my eyes as I saw someone I cared about being condensed to a bloody pulp.

I was so busy staring at Jacob, still trying to stand up, that I didn't notice the hand on my arm at first. And then I was flying through the trees, back to the hotel and into the room. Matthias showed himself.

"I find it extremely amusing how you befriended those animals." He muttered under his breath while caressing my face. "And your talent! Who knew you could actually do something of worth! Luckily, I wasn't out for too long, and it only took me a minute to remember what had happened." I growled, not caring if anyone outside the room could hear me. His caress became a slap, silencing me immediately. My thoughts turned to Edward, someone who would never dare raise a hand against my will.

"Why wont you try to see the error of your ways, Bella? It is not natural to be with them, stay with me. It is not natural to forgive the Cullens for their misdeeds, stay with me." He purred in what he must have thought was a seductive tone. It wasn't.

"Well then call me unnatural, Matthias, but I have no plans on staying with you." I sneered, pissed off and reminding myself that I was no longer the little scared human. His hand, which had glided down to my shoulder, moved to my neck quickly as he put his other hand on the hem of my shirt. I reached out and grabbed his face, leaving claw marks in his cheeks, and he kneed me in the stomach, causing me pain.

"Feisty." He called me again. "You just need to be broken." Using one of his hands to rip my shirt off, he crawled on top of me. I punched him and jumped up, but Matthias was much too quick. His arms snaked around my waist and he dragged me to the floor. I struggled to get away, feeling when my arm, being held firmly by his hand, started to tear under his fingernails. If I hadn't already been a vampire, the bones in that arm would have been reduced to dust by now.

"Stop!" I screamed. I could feel his fingernails digging into my rock hard skin; I could feel his eyes looking over my barely covered torso.

And all of a sudden, I didn't.

**Short short short chapter, sorry!**

**Sleepiness is taking over my brain!**

**Let me wake up to reviews, lovers!**

**Peace!**


	38. Burn Me Up, Baby

**Disclaimer: I own odd substances on the wall of my shower… gift from ex- boyfriend perhaps? Ew. But I don't own this.**

"_**Stop!" I screamed. I could feel his fingernails digging into my rock hard skin; I could feel his eyes looking over my barely covered torso.**_

_**And all of a sudden, I didn't. **_

**Ok, so. She could feel his fingernails and eyes, but then she couldn't anymore. That is what that last sentence means. Capische?**

My skin burned where Matthias had been touching me, and I could see puncture marks and little wounds. Wonderful. Looking to see why he stopped, I saw two blurs, one brown haired and the other with a mop of bronze tresses, engaged in a dance. Edward! But before I could even blink, the brunette blur disappeared. It was just Edward, looking around in confusion and blind anger. I rushed up to him, but before I could actually reach where he was standing, he made contact with the wall. Jumping up quickly, his snarl would have deafened humans, but just urged our enemy on. Edward's head snapped back as Matthias punched him, and I decided that I was sick of seeing people I cared for get beaten up.

But what could I do? If my prey was invisible, how could I catch him? I wished I had some interesting power, like freezing people or something. Instead I got the pointless one, the type of power that only… wait. It knocked people unconscious and gave them temporary amnesia. But I wasn't panicking right now, just angry and jumpy.

What if I tried focusing it? Tried controlling it? I would have to do it in the general direction of the fight, so Edward would likely be knocked out as well. Would I be able to dispose of Matthias without Edward's help? I sighed softly. I guess I would have to be.

I looked at the small war going on before my eyes and willed them to forget what they were fighting about. I wanted them to forget all the events that had taken place in this room, all the events that led to this pivotal moment, when a deadly tango was in effect and at least one person would not survive. I sent out feelings of hopelessness, confusion, praying that what I was trying to do would work.

And it did.

I saw Edward crumble onto the floor and a now visible heap of Matthias fall on top of him. And now I had to finish this.

Grabbing my captor in both of my hands, I layed him roughly on the bed, trying to figure out what to do first. Oh, right. The head. Leaning down and placing my mouth on his neck, I bit through the hard, cold skin and quickly turned my own neck, dismembering him. Hm. Vampires would have been useful during the French Revolution. I then moved down slowly, taking one arm and then the other off, throwing them onto the other bed. I didn't want my face anywhere near his lower body, so I used my hands on his legs. It was, in truth, a bit harder, but still manageable. If he had been awake, I was sure it would have also been more painful. Holding back my useless upchuck reflex, I looked over at the now broken puzzle previously known as Matthias. Now I needed a lighter.

Cold stone arms enveloped me and in that one instant, I felt safer than I had this entire time. Turning to face him, Edward's smile was pleased and also proud. "I saw your little show there." He noted. "Part of me is saying that I should not worry so much over you anymore. But, another part of me noticed that you are just as much of a danger magnet as you used to be." I pushed his shoulder playfully, and then stuck my hands into his back pockets. "Bella, I'm not sure that this is the most appropriate time for that." He growled.

"Pervert." I giggled. I extracted the lighter I had been searching for from one of those pockets. "At least I still have my mind on business." I smiled at him genuinely and gave him a quick kiss on the lips that were open to retaliate. Turning to the pieces of Matthias, I noticed that his eyes were open. "Oh good, so now you get to watch me set pieces of your body on fire." Those eyes opened wider, and I smiled as I turned back to the man still holding me. "Should we do this here?" I mumbled, not knowing where would be best to dispose of him. He just nodded and looked with plain disdain and hatred at the person he tried to free me from.

I walked over to him, flicking open the expensive looking lighter and setting the flame. "Goodbye, Matthias. I would say that this has been pleasant, but it obviously hasn't." I threw the lighter on top of the blanket, and it quickly caught, spreading towards his body. Matthias' eyes were frantic, and I had to look away. No matter what he had tried to do to me, I couldn't believe I had killed someone.

"We should leave." Edward muttered, taking my hand and pulling me towards the door. Together, we ran into the nearby woods and watched the small hotel catch flame. As soon as police arrived, we fled, not wanting to be caught or deemed suspects. "You're hurt." Edward said, clenching his teeth and running his hand over my as of yet unhealed wounds. "Small things." I breathed, feeling the pain when he touched them, but dealing nonetheless. He embraced me.

"I should have never left you to hunt." His lips mumbled into my hair. I twisted my neck so my lips met his and my fingers could trace around his sad eyes.

"Don't be sad, Edward. No matter what, he would have gotten me away." I couldn't stand for him to be upset over something he had virtually no control over. "Let's just go home, ok? I want to see everybody, even Rosalie." My eyes lit up with mirth, I started walking.

Pulling me in a different direction, he said jovially "Home is this way." Oh. Right.

**Ok guys, three more chapters. That's all. The review rule is still in effect, and I hope I redeemed myself for the last unbearably short chapter (apologizes again). Noticed I apologize often? Haha.**

**Peace!**


	39. Lacerations and Soup Recipes

**Disclaimer: I have two new stories that I have already started and will be posting as soon as this story is finished off, as well as one one-shot I may post tomorrow or something like that. look for them :) I don't, however, own this. Poo.**

I could hear them before I could see them. Emmett was yelling "Thank God" over and over again and Alice was squealing in excitement. Edward pulled me into the clearing in front of the stone house and I was enveloped in hard white arms. Rosalie was hugging me. "I'm glad you're okay." Well, this was a reception I could enjoy.

Esme ripped Rosalie off of me and grabbed me. I hugged her back, and then I was squeezed, together with her, by Alice. It was a surprise that the little pixie could even get her hands around the two of us, but she did. "Damn guys, I can't have been gone that long!" I giggled. Jasper walked up and gave me a quick peck on the cheek before grasping his wife gently and prying her off of me. I went back to Edward and took his hand. "Where's Carlisle?"

His eyes told me that this was not a conversation he wanted to be having with me. "He is inside… tending to Jacob Black." Without a moments notice, I dragged him into the house and followed the scent of wet dog to Carlisle's study. The good doctor was leaning over a bloody body, and I thought for a moment of having to hold my breath, but remembered that werewolves smell anything but appetizing. "Carlisle…"

He turned to me briefly, before looking back to his patient. "Because of the wolves ability to heal rapidly, Jacob sustained further injury when one of his ribs started to heal while it was still embedded in his heart. I had to open him up and remove the rib, but it made his heart weaker." He sighed, but then looked back at me and smiled. "It should all be okay though, he just needs to recuperate. Your friend saved your life." He did? I turned to Edward, whose hand I had been clenching.

"He changed into a wolf after your little friend beat him to a pulp. It almost killed him, but he could contact Seth that way, who was searching for you with me. I heard what Jacob was saying and ran to go get you, while Seth handled Jake." Oh. Part of me was upset that Jake injured himself more to keep me safe, but I knew I would be eternally (no pun intended) grateful. "Edward, where's Madeline?"

he brushed the hair out of my face. "Jasper was watching her before we came back. We were afraid she would panic, so he stayed near her to calm her. She should be sleeping now." He whispered. I nodded, walking over to Jacob. Petting the little piece of his face that wasn't bandaged or bruised, I smiled down on the person who protected me even when we were supposed to be sworn enemies.

I don't know how long I stood there, looking at his sleeping figure, with a face so peaceful in rest that it would be sad to see it twisted in pain when he woke. Eventually, Edward clutched my arm and took me downstairs, where the rest of the family was gathered. Emmett jumped up and had me in his arms before I could even blink, and was squeezing me so hard that I would have been dead if I were still human. "Emmett… can't… breathe." He let me go, looking at me questioningly.

"Bella, you don't need to breathe." He told me. I giggled. "I know, but I had to say something that would get you to stop playing like you were a boa constrictor." He ruffed my hair and sat down with Rosalie. I went to where Edward was now sitting and got comfortable on his lap. Jasper spoke first.

"So, who was that guy?" he asked timidly. I knew this was coming, so was prepared.

"He told me that he found me when I was a human and changed me so he could have a mate. I stayed with him on and off until Charlie died, when I apparently just disappeared. He wanted me, and didn't understand how I could forgive you all. His name was Matthias." I said slowly, quietly. I didn't look into anyone's eyes, not because I was ashamed or anything, but because I wanted to forget him. Edward was breathing cool air onto my little scratches, tickling and burning me at the same time. "Carlisle, I don't suppose you have anything that would help this?"

He shook his head. "Sorry, Bella. Only thing you can do is wait. The damage is small, so you should be fine by nightfall. Although I would suggest you hunt."

I agreed, but before I could stand, Emmett spoke up. "So, squirt, how did you get away? Please tell me Edward didn't do all the work."

"Actually, I did very little." Edward muttered, smiling bashfully at his family. "It was all her." Emmett looked at me expectantly.

"I tried focusing my until now useless power, I tried to make him forget about what was going on, and both he and Edward collapsed. Then I dismembered him and set the room on fire." I would have been blushing if I could have, because I felt as though I was bragging. Emmett and Jasper looked at me in awe, and the Jasper turned to Edward.

"Seems you are going to have nothing to do now that Bella knows how to defend herself." He laughed, and Edward glared. I just brushed my hand on his cheek and kissed it. Esme silenced her newest son and smiled fondly at me. "Good job, Bella, really. "

There was nothing more to tell, so the family dispersed into other various rooms. Esme muttered something about going to make food for the humans, and I suggested soup for Jacob as Edward and I walked out the door and into the woods. I quickly found a fox and devoured him. Sitting down and pulling Edward next to me; already I was feeling better.

I knew I would do anything to protect my family and myself, and I now knew I had the strength to do so.

**Two more chapters! Review por favor (like my Spanish-ness?) also, since my next chapter is super super short, I'm not giving sneak peeks, because that would pretty much be me giving you half of the chapter.**


	40. Smelly Goodbyes

**Disclaimer: I own all of the Dandy Warhols albums, and they have pretty much been on repeat for the past week. So I would give them a listen. I don't own this. Blah. Oh and p.s.- this is a short chapter. I just needed to write this :P**

"Well." Jacob said, standing on the porch of a stone house in Galena. It was raining, and we were both standing under the awning, trying to avoid getting wet. Madeline was sitting in the car with Esme, who would be taking the two to the airport. She had struck up a sort of friendship with the heart faced woman, and the two had spent days in the greenhouse, talking about god knows what. "Always an adventure with you, huh, Bells?"

"You know me, Jake, no reason to live without a whole bunch of excitement in my life." I smiled. My best friend was leaving and I didn't know when I would be seeing him again. "You'll keep in touch?" Jacob had started walking two days ago, and was itching to go return to the pack and his home.

"Now that you have your own phone, of course. I don't think the little lee- Alice would appreciate my hogging her phone lines when she wants to shop." He snorted. Over the past week and a half, he had gotten to know most of the Cullens. I can't say it helped him like them more, but it made them more real, more understandable. When goodbyes were first being said, he told me in front of Edward and Alice that he would call me often, and Edward later told me that his sister was having murderous thoughts of choking the wolf to death with phone cords; so he bought me a cell phone.

"_I can't stay anymore. I need to go see him… one last time." I mumbled. I knew he wouldn't understand, his red eyes were proof of that. Humans were nothing more that blood vendors to him._

"_So is this goodbye?" he asked me. I looked at him momentarily. "Possibly." I whispered. "Who knows? I may be back." He pulled me into an awkward hug before I took off running into the forest._

I was still having random flashbacks, some about Matthias, some not. I pushed the ones about him away, not wanting to incite daydream nightmares. Looking up to the sky, I saw the gray clouds rolling quickly over this small town. It would be snowing soon, a white winter. Turning back to my friend, I hugged him tightly, not caring what Edward or Emmett would say about he smell or about the typed of perfumes Alice and Rosalie would try dousing me in. we hugged for such a long time, until neither of us could stand the smell any longer and broke apart. I raised one hand and he took it. "Goodbye Jacob Black."

"Goodbye, Isabella Swan." Pecking me very quickly on the cheek, he ran to join his girlfriend and the vampire in the car. I waved until I couldn't see them anymore and walked back inside to my home.

**Last chapter coming up as soon as I get five reviews… and no sneak peek for this one either… I don't want to ruin it (call me crazy) and also... new story coming up as soon as i post the last chapter for this one. woo!**


	41. White Winter

**Disclaimer: I own love in my heart for all of you guys! Seriously, I loved writing this and I hope you enjoyed it as much! I don't own this, but I do have new stories coming up and a possible sequel…hmm… be on the lookout, because AS SOON as i post this, i'm uploading the first chapter to my new story (woo!) hopefully i'll have just as cool readers for that. thanks again!!**

"Does she usually go this crazy?" I whispered to Edward. He laughed quietly, his breath landing on the back of my neck and making me shiver.

"No, not really. But remember, we were all so lost for seventy years without you, no one was really in the mood to celebrate." Oh, right. I still couldn't believe it. Christmas. I loved all aspects of the holiday, but Alice blew all of my previous holiday dreams out of the water. There were trees in all the rooms, in the hallways, little Rudolph toilet seat covers even, and none of even used those! The outside of the house was completely decked out, and she had even tried to force Jasper to wear a Santa suit, although he had gracefully declined. All of us were now sitting in the living room while she tried to get Rosalie and Jasper to decorate a gingerbread house with her. Emmett was wearing the aforementioned suit, and his wife couldn't look at him with snorting.

We had already opened gifts. Alice had gotten me (big surprise there) clothes, and Rosalie had gotten me a beautiful set of hand mirrors and brushes. Emmett and Jasper had gotten together and bought me my own guitar with learning manuals. Esme bought me some books on taking care of gardens, and Carlisle had gotten me a necklace with my birthstone in it; together, he and Edward had bought me a car. I thought it was the most ridiculous idea I had heard, since there was no way to get out of this town by car anyways, but when I saw it, I actually screamed in happiness.

The outside looked exactly like my old truck had all those years ago, but the inside was completely reworked. It had state of the art stereo equipment, and it even passed Rosalie's test under the hood. She promised me she would be working on it, tweaking it a bit and improving the brakes and horsepower. All in all, this was the best Christmas I had had not only in my life, but also in my entire existence.

"Come with me." Edward whispered. I giggled a little but followed him upstairs into his room.

"Yes?" I breathed, pulling him towards the bed by his collar. I could guess what he wanted from me, he was so nervous but excited. Which is why I was surprised when he gently removed my hands from around his shirt and sat me down on the bed and paced the room.

Turning to me and taking my hands in his, he kissed me lightly. And then, he knelt down on one knee. "Bella… would you-"

"Yes." I whispered. He looked a little peevish. "Oops. Continue."

His favorite crooked smile lit up his face and the room. "Would you, Isabella Marie Swan, do me the honor of becoming my wife for all eternity?"

"I leaned down and pulled him up towards me, kissing him with as much force as I could muster. "Of course, Edward Anthony Masen Cullen. Always."

**The end.**

**:)**

maybe a sequel? i just want to deal with the other story i'm writing first...

tell me, what should i write it about if i do do a sequel? any ideas? (although i have a few in my mind)


	42. Memories in Shades of Blue

**Disclaimer: I don't own this. Poo. But without further ado, I give you my preview for "Memories in Shades of Blue"; tell me how you like it.**

The man in front of me could not stop staring. I saw two more behind him, murmuring and shooting me glances. I spoke louder, thinking it rude that they did not answer my question the first time. "Who are you?"

My frustration with them was apparent. I had no idea who they were, where I was, or how I had been able to go so long without feeding. The man closest to me turned sharply to the taller man behind him, growling lowly. That man began to step closer, holding his hands out in a show of surrender.

"Bella? Why are you so confused? I feel fear and frustration and confusion coming off of you so heavy it's crazy." What? This one knew what I was feeling? How? But before I could even ask, the one who stayed behind spoke up.

"Jeez, squirt, I'm all for a fucking joke, but really, I didn't know you were this good of an actress. No calm your lover boy down and lets get back, ok?" lover boy? And did he just call me squirt? I crouched down defensively, growling at the one furthest from me and pointing at the man who was still inching towards me. "You, stay there. You," I pointed at the one who called me names, "don't you dare call me squirt. And you," pointing towards the one who was closest "tell me who you are and why you know my name."

"Edward, I think she's serious. She's getting really frustrated with us." The tallest one whispered to the one closest to me. The look on Edward's face grew more defined and I saw the pain in his eyes. Who were these people?


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